Five Spectacular Missions From Past Grand Theft Auto Games

Grand Theft Auto V is now available, which very well could mean that by the time you are reading this, you could already be playing it. Do you realize that, even though I am speaking 100% hypothetically, I am still envious of you at this exact moment? I don't actually have the game yet, and realistically, you may not either, yet I am jealous knowing you could. Sad, huh?
[h2]Black Project – San Andreas[/h2]

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I like surreal, weird shit. I like pop culture references, and I like science fiction. And while San Andreas was mostly a gritty crime caper about one man seeking redemption, and the people he surrounds himself with not letting that happen, it had its goofier moments.  And as much as we all want to pretend we are the ONE gamer who saw Bigfoot in this game, that’s bullshit. Bigfoot doesn’t come around until some Red Dead DLC many years later. BUT, San Andreas did have one pretty fantastic and out-there moment, highlighted by you acquiring an item unlike any in a GTA game to date.

I am, of course, talking about the jet pack you take from area 69 (because, of course it is named that) during the Black Project level of San Andreas. I liked it because it stood in contrast to what the game was up to that point, which was quite realistic. The funny thing is, they did the level so well, and treated it with the same respect as any other, that it ended up feeling like it was an actual part of this world you were in. Plus, you got a jet pack. A motherf**king jet pack.

Unfortunately, if GTA V does something like this, some virginal nerd will take to some comment board on some dusty corner of some website somewhere and scream about how it is a Saints Row ripoff. We can find that nerd and beat him while he weeps, reminding him with crushing blows from our elbows that GTA is the Father of all of this, and Saints Row wasn’t even a sperm in its Daddy’s danglers when San Andreas, and this mission, came out.

Booyakasha.


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