Sometimes a news story comes around that provides so many opportunities for jokes that it’s almost too much. Today is one of those days, as videos have surfaced of an engineer from Valve demonstrating two new controllers he created, one of which is “posture-based” (that’s a fancy way of saying it’s operated by a person’s butt) and the other is operated by tongue.
The engineer is Ben Krasnow, and he showed off his inventions on YouTube in two separate videos, probably so people don’t get confused and think the tongue controller and butt controller are connected for some sort of virtual salad tossing scenario. The butt controller is operated by leaning in various directions as you sit on it, which would make it just about perfect for a sledding or downhill racing game. The other controller fits in your mouth and is controlled by your tongue. The practical applications there might seem less obvious for gamers, but it could be quite useful for quadriplegics as a way of controlling all sorts of devices ranging from video game consoles to wheelchairs.
It is important to note that these creations are a side project for Krasnow and are not officially associated with Valve. In other words, don’t expect the upcoming Steam Box to come bundled with a copy of Butt Surfing 3D. Krasnow’s YouTube channel is full of all sorts of engineer geekery, like an instructional video on how to build an LCD display and an explanation of how kilowatt-hours meters work. Good stuff for the technically inclined, but it provides precious few other opportunities to make salad tossing jokes.
For explanations of both controllers and how they work, check out the two videos below. Then cross your fingers and hope that Valve finds some way to incorporate them into future gaming hardware so all your dreams of a virtual twerking simulator and first-person lollipop licking game can finally come true.
