Remy – Imprint
Imprint can now be ordered as a movie, but originally it was an episode of Showtime’s Masters of Horror series, directed by the brilliant (and fucked up) Takashi Miike. This episode was SO messed up, they banned it from airing. NO, really – a cable channel banned it from airing. It is basically an hour of the worst torture porn you have ever seen, all done by an old woman on a young prostitute. You know those movies that seem to revel in cruelty, and are actually hard to watch for that reason? Yes, this is one of those. There are lingering scenes of true brutality that even some horror fans can never get over, let alone our Moms. If my Mom watched any of Imprint, I feel her eyes would gray over and she would go blind.
Yeah, it is THAT messed up.
Nato – Black Christmas (1974)
Ah, the Christmas season. All the stockings are hung by the chimney with care, the aroma of freshly baked Christmas cookies fills the air, presents are being wrapped, and holiday movies can finally be watched with relevance once again. You’ve got your How The Grinch Stole Christmas, A Christmas Story, Frosty The Snowman – but if you really want to terrify your family come the next family Christmas movie marathon, all you have to do is sneak Black Christmas into the DVD player when no one is watching.
Not only will your mother shriek at the absolute horror being brought to such a joyous family holiday, but she won’t know how to react when heads start rolling and the heavy breathing begins. Going along with the rest of my picks, Mom definitely won’t approve of some seriously bone-chilling kills that seem all too real, but she’ll be more off-put by our killer’s randomly vulgar phone calls that make you wince every time the phone rings. You know he’s on the other end, you know he’s evil, and you know he’s got a whole script of perverse lines and obscenities cued up and ready to burn our ears off.
If you want your mother to respect you during the holiday season, I’d say stick to sharing figgy pudding with her and leave Black Christmas as a little late-night treat for yourself while you anxiously await jolly old Saint Nick.
Alright disciples, do you agree with our list? Did we miss any depraved horror stand-outs so vile your mother would disown your for watching them?
*A special thanks to Remy for stepping in to guest write! Feel free to follow either of us on Twitter for even more insanity and updates:
Matt Donato Follow @DoNatoBomb
Remy Carreiro Follow @RemyCarreiro
Like what you read? Check out last week’s article where Remy and I talk about stand-out moments in horror gaming that made us pee a little bit!
