Nostalgia Sucks: Five Movies You Loved As A Kid (That Are Actually Terrible)

You can’t really say anything about the animation if you’re talking from today’s standpoint. Back then, that kind of animation was probably pretty damn awesome. Now we just have better technology and therefore produce better looking animated films. Other than that, haven’t watched most of them to really say anything about your criticism.

Well Space Jam was awesome as a kid, but I’m fairly sure everyone thought Jingle All The Way and Super Mario Bros sucked back in the day.

“[HOOK] also happens to [be] the worst film Steven Spielberg has ever made.”

The existence of ALWAYS invalidates your argument.

Why are Hook and An American Tail in here? Also, why are the others in here? We knew they sucked since their releases. Must have never been a child, because you give them very little credit.

I’m with you on all of them except Hook. Hook is still fun escapism. When a movie doesn’t take itself incredibly seriously, it’s okay for it to be campy fun. We could use a few more swashbuckling fun movies today, IMO.

I had a Turbo Man action figure. And considering they were selling for upwards of $100 on ebay FIVE YEARS AGO I’m wishing I took better care of it.

Watched all of these recently. Mario bros and jingle all the way are the only ones you have a point about, the rest are still f*cking awesome. Eat an entire bag of dicks.

I still like Jingle all the way. To be fair all Christmas films have an over use of sentiment and glee in them, but that’s Christmas (Not Holidays my US friends) all over. Jingle all the way is an A typical by the numbers films from Hollywood. I am downloading now to watch it later after coming back from my Adam Ant concert.

i liked a movie called “adventures in dinosaur city” when i was a kid and tried showing it to my cousin lately and realized it sucked. Space jam is and always will be awesome

They have An American Tail, and Hook, both of which are still good movies, but not Howard the Duck?

Umm, this article is just plain CONFUSING. First, several of the movies WERE ALWAYS BAD. And at least one was considered bad, but really wasn’t, and I’m talking about HOOK. I was pretty upset with what they did with HOOK, first time watching it….but since then, I’ve watched about every two years without fail. It’s just………plain……..good. If you think everyone LOVED it as a child, THAT THEN would be why you’re clueless.

Some people liked it, but at the time it came out, it was PANNED. (sorry) There were just as many people that HATED IT. You just have this one quite backwards.

Except for American Tail, That Guy With The Glasses touched upon all of these movies and thoroughly eviscerated them (especially Jingle All The Way). Also, I don’t think anyone liked the Super Mario Bros movie…Dennis Hopper and Bob Hoskins certainly didn’t.

You should add Jumanji and Sandlot on there too… those movies are horrible. I re-watched them now that I’m older and jeewhiz, they suck.

Batman. I mean, it’s one of the most boring and stupid movies I ever seen, and the only reason everyone love it is because they saw it when they were young, I suppose

Hook is not terrible at all. I still watch it and enjoy it. Loved it as a child.

lmfao ur fucking reasons why these movies are terrible are really fucking dumb…. who the fuck writes these things?!?! i hope these are just user submitted by some lonely fat boy who had no real childhood… because if u get paid to do these blogs and reviews i feel bad for this website

Barnard, I’m sorry, but you’re just wrong. Half of these movies were horrible even in the 90s. Hook is not a good movie, but it is still charming.
But An American Tail is a positively outstanding movie. Yes, it’s depressing, but would you expect a movie about finding your family to be a happy-go-lucky romp?

Most people would disagree with that “But kids are dumb” part.

I kinda see the point on Hook, but to call it Spielberg’s worst film?! As renowned as the guy is, he’s had his hands in some real steaming piles over the last few years: War of the Worlds, Indiana Jones 4, the last half hour of A.I., just to name a few.

No one ever thought Super Mario Bros. The Movie was good.

thanks a lot TJ, you ruined my childhood indulgences.

Dude seriously, I can agree with quite a few of these. The basis you use for An American Tail though is just stretching for something. The coloring was on purpose as it was supposed to be a depression era film that made you feel that and still overcome everything. It is like a ride you take with the character to see even in the darkest there is hope. Now I come to Hook, you are trying to make Hook out like it was supposed to be something dramatically amazing or something. It was meant to be a fun little movie to waste time. While many things are problematic, in the end the same can be said for every single movie if you wanna be nit picky( I didnt watch it until I was 22 myself).

Hook is still pretty legit.

Even as a kid I could tell that Mario Bros was terrible, I think everyone could. Nailed it with Jingle All The Way too, but the rest I can’t really back you on.

get a LIFE MATE ALL OF THOSE MOVIES ARE GOOD FOR KIDS..HAVE YOU EVEN WATCHED THEM OR DID YOU JUST READ REVIEWS ON THEM.

Fuck you, Space Jam is magnificent.

this dude had a childhood… of shit taste in movies.

More like “Four Movies You Hated As A Kid (plus one that was meh and didn’t get better)”

Never saw Mario Bros. Movie, but loved all of the other ones. The only real problem I had with Space Jam was that I wasn’t really into basketball. And as cheesy as it was, I preferred Looney Toons: Back in Action when it came out. I continue to love Hook. I think the only movies that I thought were the greatest things ever that I watch now and realize they are terrible are the Spy Kids movies.

boring? gloomy enviornments? “badly animated”. so it has to have lots of action grab your attention and be bright and cheery to be good? I think you are wrong, soo very wrong.

Hook is awesome. I’m going to go rent it on VHS right now.

I’ve never seen the Mario film, and the image that went with it in this article will probably keep me scared enough to not watch it for a while. That and the bad track record with video games being made into films.

An American Tale and Hook both bored me as a kid. Sorry to those who loved and still love them, but I didn’t and I don’t. However, there were many more horrible kids movies to come out at the time that were probably more deserving of this list than these two.

Jingle All the Way was forced on me by my parents when I was a kid and they still love it. I’m conflicted about it, because there are some hilarious moments, but the overall film isn’t that great.

I LOVED Space Jam as a kid, pretty much solely because of the Looney Tunes. I haven’t watched it in a while, mostly because I’m afraid watching it now will ruin it for me. Until I work up the courage, I will continue to love it.

One movie from my childhood I that I loved a lot at the time was Little Nemo: Adventures in Slumberland. My sister and I both used to watch it all the time, and thought it would be fun to watch it again. It was terrible. I can’t unwatch it and I wish I could.

wow wow wow wow…..you didn’t like Super Mario Bros? that movie was awesome.

Ask yourself this: Was the intended audience entertained? If your answer is “yes” then the movie was good. Critics are too consumed with some esoteric ideal of perfection. I rarely pay attention to them.

Hook can resonate deeply with adults who understand it beyond its superficial levels. Thematically, Hook is a complete deviation from Peter Pan. Rather than the traditional coming-of-age story where a child faces a struggle that brings him into adulthood, Hook completely turns the archetype on its head. It’s really quite complex. The real question that Hook explores is, “What does it mean to be an adult?” You may could argue that it doesn’t do so very successfully (I would not), but to say it offers nothing fresh, offers nothing unique, is lazy, is kitsch, and fails to develop character is just completely unsubstantiated.

Wait… someone actually liked the Super Mario Bros. movie? I saw that as a kid (well, I was 13, but close enough), and I thought it was seriously shitty.

considering the focused at audiences of these movies; I think this guy needs a new day job

And all these movies are great. Especially Mario Brothers!

What a moron. I still love Jingle All the Way. One of Arnie’s best comedies and Sinbad, Robert Conrad and Phil Hartman were great too.

The person writing this article needs a hug and a candy bar. These were great movies, in childhood and even now.

American Tail, Secret of Nimh, and Land Before Time are all great movies – although Nimh is a little weird. The second American Tail was way more Disney and much less enjoyable. It should have been Fieval Goes West on the list…. which I still like btw

Chitty-Chitty-Bang-Bang. Forgettable songs and indifferent acting by almost everyone except Dick Van Dyke and that creepy guy with the lollipops for fingers. If they’d stuck closer to the Ian Fleming book (yes, you read that correctly), it would have been a nice precedent to the Spy Kids movies.

You completely missed the point of Jingle All the Way, but you did understand exactly what the movie’s plot is about.

A father thinks that giving his son a toy will make him happy, and fix all his problems. He does tons of crazy things, and bad things, to try to get this toy. He even tries stealing it.

The way the movie was directed promotes this further – the director wants the audience to follow along with Arnold the whole way, to see everything from his point of view. So the audience watches and thinks exactly what the director wants them to think – “What an idiot, Arnold. What a dumb toy! Why does the boy want the toy so much? Why is Arnold trying so hard to get it? If only he got the toy earlier!” But this is exactly what the director wants you to think. He wants you to understand why Arnold is acting this way, but to also see how wrong YOU are, by showing you exactly what Arnold does and why it’s wrong. The main character of this movie is Arnold, who is also supposed to be the VIEWER – that’s where I get “YOU” from.

The boy, however, as seen in many scenes, does want the toy, but the toy is not the center of what he really wants – his father. You can tell when he’s talking on the phone with his dad and chews him out for never keeping his promises. You can tell in the first scene with the father and the son, when they’re talking in his room and the son is disappointed his father missed his karate show – not disappointed because he’s worried about getting something for Xmas. You can also tell how Jamie never mentions the toy as anything other than a “It’d be great to have” kinda thing. At the end, the kid doesn’t even want the toy – he only wanted his father to be there and keep his promises.

The father, however, interprets this all incorrectly. He only sees his family as a client to take care of. What does the client want? he wonders. Well, a toy, of course. This is showing how much of a bad father he is.

Arnold finally realizes toward the end of the movie that this toy obsession has got to end, and that it’s causing him to be a bad person (focusing only on possessions). He decides toward the end to just go to the parade with his wife and son, and to try to salvage the rest of the holiday just like the mother previously said she was going to do. On the way to do that, he gets caught up in the mess with Sinbad, and gets put in a Turboman suit.

If you disliked the movie, that’s fine. But don’t say the message of the movie is awful, because if you got that out of it you clearly missed it.
The message is that Xmas (or any holiday), in fact any day, is about family, and spending time with people who are important to you. People want presents, and that’s important too, but it’s not the most important thing about Xmas. It took a father a full hour and a half movie to realize how wrong he is.

I don’t read these articles because I want to have my own opinions reflected back at me. I really do appreciate that you have your own point of view. I think it’s very interesting that a film can receive glowing praise from critics, it can stand the test of time and still be loved by most and yet one person thinks it’s the worst thing ever made.

What’s really going on: Maybe Hook’s sentiment doesn’t reach you. The film is about a jaded somewhat cynical and distracted adult. He’s forgotten what’s most valuable is the love and innocence that children know so well. The film it’s self is about the kind of person that would right an article like this. You may have truly lost your childhood spirit.

I realize some of the films you list are just crap. People my age hated Mario Brothers when it came out but Hook, Hook is different. Hook is one of a kind. I think it’s amazing that Hook is what it is and I think it took a visionary like Spielberg to pull it off.

On the surface Hook looks like the worst idea ever. A live action sequel to Peter Pan staring Robin Williams as Peter…What? That just sounds ridiculousness. It has all the elements to become an over the top “family night movie” filled with stupid jokes. It could have just been a vehicle to make money. And I agree that sentimentality has destroyed many films but in my opinion Hook is the perfect example of sentiment done right. I’m a grown male adult and the film almost brings me to tears.

Are you critical of “sentimentality” or Hook’s effectiveness at going for sentiment? I first saw Hook when I was 18. I was young but I definitely wasn’t into cheesy kids films but I loved Hook then. I just recently rewatched it and was shocked at how powerful it is. I think it has genuine heart and came from a real place of love. I think that’s why you don’t like it. It’s too emotional.

I’d love to know what you think about Finding Neverland. It’s about the author of Peter Pan and it makes the same point.

Redeeming factors: The lost boys skateboarding though the trees was pretty stupid.

I saw Hook in the theaters when I was a young adult. I didn’t hate it but didn’t think it was all that great either. No I didn’t start hating it till it came to cable. I swear it seems like the movie ran every 20 minutes, and if you are wondering how a 2hr movie could run every 20 min, I’m sure that some sort of time manipulation technology was involved. You never had to check the tv guide, Hook was always on

Oh, come on, how can you not like a movie that features Mojo Nixon yelling “The King is everywhere!”?

Who ever really liked any of these movies?

well if you take out american tail which was not that bad really, and of course Hook he is right about the rest, and yeah..

KILL THE LAWYEEEER!!!

I missed most of these films mostly because I could see they weren’t worth watching. But I saw “Hook,” not as a child but as an adult and I loved it. Still do. Peter’s redemtion and re-claiming of the “Pan” mantle were great.

Even as a small child I knew that Mario Brothers was one of the worst movies of all time.

Worst Spielberg movie ever? Did you not see “1941″?

Space Jam is awesome. I don’t even careeee!

I only dissagree in that I never loved most of these movies as a Kid. I knew they were bad then, and I know they are bad now.

Nobody loved the Super Mario Brothers movie as a kid. That was just you, dude. I knew it sucked when I saw the trailer.

Super Mario Bros. was certainly a terrible movie, but it has the privilege of introducing a lot of us in the US to the fantastic UK actress Fiona Shaw – Who this generation of children know as “Aunt Petunia” from the Harry Potter films.

Wow as a child you had terrible taste in movies, all of the ones mentioned, I thought were terrible when they came out when I was a kid.
Apart from an American tail, just because a films a bit miserable doesn’t make it rubbish.
Your article called all kids stupid!
What what a prick, I watched every film possible growing up, not just big Hollywood movies like yourself.
Comeback when you have something decent to say!!

I’d argue over the other ones, but did anyone really think Super Mario Bros. was any good? You may as well drag out Theodore Rex with Whoopie Goldberg(‘s 3 million dollar paycheck) and say that was beloved at the time.

I would like to add the original Tron to this list. I am a huge sci fi fan but I never watched Tron growing up. Recently I decided to patch this gaping hole in my movie repertoire and was shocked by how nonsensical and essentially unwatchable this movie is. The characters are spewing “computer” lingo in muffled voices while being forced to do things for some evil reason. On the surface the plot seems fun and I respect the early use of CGI, but ultimately it seems like one of those movies where they’re trying to fool little kids into thinking its awesome. And they succeeded with the little kids of the 80′s.

You just have really bad taste

Everyone shut up, Space Jam was wonderful. It still is. It has the Looney Tunes. It’s not suppose to have a point! All the randomness is what makes it freakin’ awesome. And the little tiny aliens are cute and they look like they’re high, which is entertaining on a whole different level.

I disagree with space jam. Its Michael Jordan the greatest basketball player of all time need I say more. then you put some more great atheletes, larry bird mugsy bougues, and so on on top of bill murray and the lonney tunes. granted the storyline isnt the best but for its time it was a perfect movie for children. as for the rest they all were terrible except for hook it was a classic, it is the best rendition of peter pan they will ever make. I mean come on dude dustin hoffman and robin williams really

How dare you.

this dude dont know about movies at all… a stephen spielberg movie is terrible??? ok ok… the guy who wrote this must be one of the greatest director/producer of all time… oh wait… he isnt… pls someone should just sue him for being an idiot

i feel like this article was written by some asshole who actually takes the same materials into critiquing childrens movies as he does into critiquing r rated art films. I will die before I let someone besmearch the good name of Robin MOTHERFUCKING Williams. Next thing you know this cocksuckers gonna talk shit on Mrs. Doubtfire. Dickweed.

WTF is this sh*t list???? this guy(who wrote this awful article) should be buried next to an ant hill and die a painful death, so at least, we know he can feel anything. Hook, An American Tail and Space Jam was, and IS great, the only people who didn’t enjoy these movies are cynical,thick-hearted people who have very low to zero connection with their emotional selves, or those people who grew up having a terrible childhood….

and the WORST PART of this article is, he included lowly scores from rotten tomatoes(the worst thing that happened to the movie industry), which are infested by wannabe-movie-critics who watch movies for their cold hard technical details and not about the story, sentiments and visual & psychological interpretations, and desperately want to feel important that they will lash out on every movie they come across, the person who wrote this article must have even stolen awful reviews from the douchebags in rotten tomatoes(or this guy probably is one of those douchebags from RT)

shaun of the dead awesome

Did someone piss in this guy’s cheerios for like, EVERY SINGLE DAY during his childhood? Seriously! Why are you gonna sit there and be so damn critical of kids’ movies? THEY’RE FOR KIDS.

Super Mario Bros was written and directed by a husband/wife team who’d clearly never played any of the games, only sat through multiple episodes of the god awful animated series.

another uneducated list from an idiot born of this generation – ruined before he even knew it by being brought up on GARBAGE…get a life dude – you have no clue what you’re talking about and just cuz it’s on the net doesn’t validate your uselessness one bit. Fuckin souless loser.

If this guy had actually taken the time to read the original book/play of JM Barrie’s Peter Pan, then he would understand just how genius the movie is. It isn’t anywhere close to a rehash of the original Peter Pan story (as he said), and yet it gives little elements that hint back to the original story. The fight scenes were of decent quality for the early 90′s, so unless he is comparing the fight scenes to today’s standards (which would also be ridiculous), he really shouldn’t comment.

Never compare anything to the Disney version. The Disney Version is a horrible adaptation of the original play, and takes too many liberties with the story. The level of “magical qualities” was never truly defined in the play. It was actually kinda open ended, so the reader could personally define them as being either literal or even metaphorical (Flying aside; I feel). Or simply put from a child’s perspective, like whether Peter was actually chasing a rogue, detached shadow or his own shadow simply left because it was being cast on a far wall and Peter was a simple-minded child who chased the negative dispersion of light interacting with different angled surfaces.

I agree with the overall premise of the article. None of the films are objectively good movies because children’s movies are made for kids who are actually stupid. Their brains aren’t done yet.

Personally 3/5 I never liked and always knew were crap. Seriously no one ever thought Mario Bro’s was a good movie. Jordan can’t even play the character of himself.

Jingle & Hook however have some actual value. Sinbad & Hartman were both excellent foils for Ahnold and I bunch of basically but entertaining crap happening can be enjoyable. Hook is no doubt more bad then good and each time I watched as I grew older I noticed more I disliked… OK he was right but whats wrong with loving a little Rufio, Rufio, Rufio? Could have worded that better. The real question is what does he have against the Lion King?

Hook rocks. Even the writer agrees that everyone but himself thinks so.

right in the childhood!

Errmm, what would be wrong with putting this article on one page? ‘Didn’t read it, because I’m not going to sit through a page-load for each sentence of this thing. These lists are trivia by definition – entertaining trivia, but… trivia.

We are talking about a list with a grand total of five (5) items here. I’m not going to mess with navigating multiple pages for something that could fit into six paragraphs. Someone needs to review their Web Design 101 before going live with this stuff. “Piss on the user” is not an attitude that inspires readership. Kthxbye.

Any movie starring Dustin Hoffman and Robin Williams is good *PERIOD*

C’mon, this movie was adorable!

how old is the author 13?

I loved Barberella ( can’t believe my parents let me watch that), Flash Gordon, Earth Girls are Easy( another highly inappropriate movie for my underage eyes to see) I still love that highly random scene Where MT VJ “Downtown” Julie Brown sang. Here is the link for those of you who don’t know….,http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rNfZxgkH7k , The Prophesy, Breakin and Breakin 2: Electric Bugaloo, and Warlock. I have tons more that I watched and love…and still love. Will I ever watch them again…maybe if I become desperate enough…or if I crave a really awesome B or C movie. I refuse to do D movies again. Do you hear Uwe Boll, NEVER AGAIN!!!

Oh T.J. Of all these movies, Jingle All The Way was your favorite? I’m sorry, but that movie is, to put it eloquently, the suckiest suck to have ever sucked.

How old are you guys if you think Jingle All The Way was a Movie you Loved as a Kid???!!!??? Jesus!!! Are you 14???!!!??? BUT!!! That’d be right! Teenagers these days are too smart and too into getting rich instead of having fun and being dumb! Jingle All The Way..! Pfft… You guys are so young!!! Yet you’re probably rich now for creating this website aren’t ya??? JESUS!!!

How about you actually say something specific instead of just trashing the movies? I agree that most of these movies are terrible, but you could tell us why instead of just coming up with different ways to say you don’t like them.

Jingle All The Way… loved it, surprisingly. Did not see it as a kid but rather on a whim in my mid-20′s. Much to my surprise, I thought it was very funny.

…And I was in my twenties when all these films came out.

Okay yes Hook has nostalgia. But let’s talk Robin Williams 4 1 sec. Many comedy actors get no respect. The 1′s that do is because they do the same thing over & over again. Robin Williams is guilty of it. But you look beyond his typical work & he really does show great moments of potential. People saw it in Good Mourning Vietnam, chew over Awakenings, a court room moment of Miss Doubtfire, Secret Agent, I’ll even defend him in the overrated Good Will Hunting, What Dreams May Come, Final Cut, Big White, Night Listener & Tiny Cameo in Dead Again. Now most of his films usually only have him & if ever 1 cameo. Now it’s easy to say that the majority of his work. Just like films like Graduate, Midnight Cowboy, Kraimer VS Kraimer, Tootsie, Rainman & Mr Magoriums Wonderful Emporium have overshadowed masterpieces like Little Big Man, All The Presidents Men, Marathon Man, Straight Time, Family Business, Billy Bathgate, Wag The Dog, Confidence & The Lost City. Bob Hoskins because of a Disney film & Mario is forever stained. Although he was great in Roger Rabbit surprising that he’s British & show’s no sign of it. Films like The Long Good Friday & his work in Cotton Club go unnoticed now.

So all these guys are overshadowed by stupid flicks. Not to mention back to Robin Williams. All his movies only have him & a 1 other guy, De Niro, Pachino, Walter Matheu, Jeff Bridges & the list goes on. He doesn’t have the luck 2 be born in the 70′s where I’m sure like Hoffman & Pachino. He’d have a good list of great & bad films. Some relying completely on him or a duo as they usually do. But like Hook &…We’ll Old Dog’s technically had some big people, I mean Matt Dillon Mr. 50′s in the 80′s but come on the co-star is overrated ass John Travolta.

So yes Robin William’s get’s 2 lead 1 great Epic ensombled films with underrated Hoskins & unrecognizable Hoffman. Only 1 problem. It’s an EPIC kid’s film which let’s face it how many are there really? If you can call OZ which is clearly only ment for mom’s & (I’m not clever enough to think of a better adjective)then what can you really call Epic? HOOK That’s what.

Sure it used set’s, So did most films of the time. Sure they’re elaborate. But stripping them down probably would’ve made them look really fake. I’ve never been a Spielberg fan, He’s never given anyone struggling except Hoskin’s a break. He missed out not getting Untouchables. Maybe it’s just my taste but I don’t care about Hon Solo looking for treasure unless he was a pirate. I don’t care about Sperm Alians. Dinosaurs, Horses, Alians that look like terds & show ignorant ass kid’s which trust me living in the time of Problem Child & Denis The Menace, I don’t think any kid liked ET, I think it was a film adults thought was cute & shoved down our throats, I don’t care about Sharks, Opera & Abuse, War & saving Matt Damon, Do a fucking Gangster or Mickey Rourke pic or get fucked. Since Rourke’s only Spielberg film is his first 1941. So he’s got an epic early SNL flick, a good Leonardo flick & Hook & beyond that he produced some good early Zemeckis before he went digital.

Now I admit I was a dumb kid when I liked Space Jam, Rain check. The Jingle All The Way is hilarious. You got this overly action guy pretending 2 be an everyday dad. I mean It’s seriously like they asked Thor, Hulk not Banner, or Conan which let’s face it he is, Hey why don’t you play an everyday father. As a kid the reality of the film wasn’t no big deal, but watching now it’s just crazy.

Now I know that Cutthroat Island is just the “Worse film ever” meaning we can never have another pirate film again unless it has even bigger over the top fake ass Bruckheimer a scumbag who’s biggest crime is fooling the american public into liking Nicholas Cage. But hey let’s think about it. A flick with a baby eyed terd for girls to woo over, a gay pirate, a PG13 balless film that pretends to have balls & Disney slapped on it for credit. As if people were 2 stupid 2 know that Hollywood & Touchstone is a pork term for Disney.

So yes shame Spielberg for once getting his shit together. Using some good actors not that Walken wasn’t cool in Catch Me If You Can briefly. Actually he was kinda wasted now that I think about it. Making an EPIC KID’s FILM. Enthuses on EPIC because it was.I know kid’s are evil & don’t deserve anything. But this film did have plenty for grownups & is still endearing.

Now I’ll address the real problem people have with the film. Why would someone forget they were peter pan.

The same reason kids everyday block out abuse. Abuse lead’s 2 a change in kid’s people notice it & repeal, Abuse generally ruins the person someone could have been & makes them a shell of they’re potential & 1 day they remember & they’re whole sanity comes crashing down.

No imagine, When Peter got to Neverland he tried 2 forget life pre neverland & live in the now. Then he decided 2 stay in the real world after loosing Wendy’s youth 2 old age. So again he lived in the now. As time went on & he grew. The idea he was once a forever prince having the time of his life & is now a real person in everyday real life & is gonna grow old & die. Stuff he never had 2 deal with. Seems like allot to give up a care free immortal adventurous life to be a normal working person who is gonna grow old & die.

Now granted that probably is 2 deep for most kid’s at the time 2 understand it. But that’s why it’s so good watching it was a kid. As a kid, Growner up people make they’re responsibilities & getting 2 stay up late seem so cool that kid’s rush 2 grow up. Then they do & it sucks. Movies like this unsuccessfully try 2 warn kids that growing up isn’t all that it’s looks. But kid’s never quite grasp it & live in the now & that is the tragedy of HOOK.

So as I say up your’s 2 the writer.

T.J. Barnard, eres un gilipollas.

Hook será maravillosa por siempre.

This entire review was obviously just written to make his writing quota and to garner some comments. I was going to go through and write this long dissertation but came to realise that it was unneeded because most reasonable people know that children movies are made for…….. why yes, they are made for children. To hold them to any other standard is ludacris at best. Cinematography and good acting is great and all but the real test of a children’s movie is replayability(does your child play it over and over, or was it once and then never watched again) and by that standard these are all proven good children movies. One other thing, I don’t know what rock you were growing up under but I can’t think of anywhere in the country that any 10yr old boy didn’t know who Michael Jordan was(even little old ladies that hated sports knew who he was).

Just because rotton tomatoes says something doesnt make it true. I for one still love Hook and think its a bloody good film. Duston Hoffman played the captain so well that I didnt even realise it was him until years later.

you forgot the neverending story. a few good scenes of dialog but mostly BAD. don’t believe me, watch it again.

This article is full of shit, written by someone that grew up without a TV and was jealous of all the other kids that actually had a normal happy childhood.

Jingle All The way isn’t a good movie, unless a person has a special interest in it. I personally like Arnold, the Big Show, the DJ, and Sinbad’s performance.

I’ve never watched Super Mario Bros, only because I’ve seen previews and somehow resisted watching.

Space Jam was one of my favorite movies for years, until I was even out of high school. I watched it four or so years ago and realized that it is nowhere near as good as I thought it was, although it isn’t completely and utterly terrible. It’s not a good movie, but it’s entertaining.

I haven’t watched An American Tail since I was a kid, but it does have a 68% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. A 68% rating makes it a good movie, meaning that it belongs nowhere on this list.

Hook, IMO, is a classic. Is it overrated? Yes. Is it a film featuring great effects and acting? No. It’s a VERY FUN film, though. That’s why it is so beloved. I personally am a HUGE fan of Robin Williams, I remember RU-FI-OOOOO, “lookie lookie I’ve got Hooky!” the fat black kid who rolls into a ball, and the pirates being morons. Is it a bad movie? Probably, but the fun scenes make it good.

You are an idiot i could writte why but that would be a waste of my time.To say that space jam is a bad movie…..well you suck man……i love basketball even today and a big part why i started plazing it is because i watched this movie…….Space Jam is a great movie and IT IS FUNNY

I always thought that ET was great as a kid, but horrible as an adult, even as a teenager.

lol the only movie i know from these is space jam and its still epic

Space Jam is the shit you asshole

No, “Somewhere Out There” is NOT the most beautiful song ever written, it’s actually the first clue that “An American Tail” could be much better.

As for “Jingle All the Way”, it’s just one of those films which REQUIRES the main character be a piece or work. I’m sorry if this disillusions you, but it didn’t make the film awful. The sad thing is, there actually are such clueless people in the world as Arnold’s character here. Mind you, I didn’t like the film either.

Okay, I admit it: I was no kid when these monsters came out. For me, Space Jam was a nasty revelation as to how far WB had sunk. Need I say more?

If I saw SMB, it made no impression on me.

As for Hook, while nothing special, it really wasn’t that bad. This is what comes of finding out your cherished memories are crap: you overreact and hate beyond reason.

It’s also why I despise creators who make garbage just because the target audience is young. You’re a professional, so do the work of a pro and get it right. Because when a teenager looks back and sees that his taste was horrible, it creates a kind of self-loathing which can become unhealthy. Stop doing this to our children!

Feivel bored me to death even as a kid, so did Space Jam.
Hook was okay though.

Hook is an amazing film, Dustin Hoffman was perfect as Hook, i could talk about all the great parts of the film but i’d prob have to make my own article explaining how good of a film Hook is

I must be ancient, Hook was a cow pat

I agreed with every review except for Hook, which I first saw as an adult, and which I STILL consider to be cute, fun entertainment. Granted, it’s not Oscar worthy by any means; but it certainly isn’t a BAD movie, especially by comparison to most of what Hollywood puts out these days.

You lewd,crude, rude, bag of pre-chewed food dude

Awww I love Hook! I still cry whenever it ends! I wanted Peter to come whisk me away to Never Never Land at the age of four! But I think the best part now is knowing that Rufio has gone on to play Prince Zuko in Avatar: The Last Airbender. My youngest brother and I wanted to watch a movie but couldn’t agree on one. I finally suggested Hook out of frustration. He considered no but then I said, “Rufio is Prince Zuko.” “Put it in.” We spent the movie shouting out stupid shit like “Rufio look your honor!” every time Dante came on screen. Way more fun than it should have been. Besides, Rufio is a total hottie! And now he’s Zuko?! That Dante Brasco is in it makes it gold, plain and simple.

Ru-fi-ooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhh!!!

Hook!

“The plot (a kind of half-assed twist on the original story)”

My understanding was that JM Barrie had actually planned (or at least contemplated) on a story where Peter did leave Neverland, did grow up and forget his life there, and did end up going back. But it never got written up. So I wouldn’t really call the plot a “half-assed twist”. Otherwise, I will admit I love this film. I recall it being the first movie my parents let me stay up past my bedtime to watch when it was on TV (which at that time I got to stay up until 9pm!). I love the film Hook!

I will also admit that it is extremely cheesy, that most the child actors in it really ham things up, there are some rather creepy parts for a kids movie (Tink kissing Peter, the mermaid scene, etc), the wardrobe… oh god what can I say about that? Bob Hoskins as Smee though is great (which he reprises the role of in Neverland). So I will admit the film is rather bad, but I love it partly for the odd quirkness it has and mostly due to that nostalgic bit.

Also, do you really know people who like the Mario film?

Jingle all the way was never good. I hated that movie as a kid, and now! Space Jam was awesome, even if it is a B movie. It has Bugs bunny and the Loony tunes in Space! Plus Micheal Jordan I believe I can fly was one of our inspired SR class songs. American Tale is depressing, and a little dark but offers hope to many lost kids. I had a lot of friends who immigrated to the US as a kid, and they all say An american tale gave them hope, courage, and wisdom. I mean every kid’s worst fear is being separated from their parents, and Fival is, but then he gets reunited! He also is befriended and helped by a cast who society tells him is harmful. Tiger, normally an enemy, but they become best friends. Tony, and his girlfriend. Teaches kids to see the person, not the stereotype. I have never seen Mario Bros. Finally you insult Hook? Its still one of my whole family’s favorite films from Dad, Mom, Grandpa, Grandma, my little cousins, aunts and Uncles, etc! It was Peter Pan going back to being Pan! It made us laugh, wish for adventure, taught us great vaules and morals, cry why Roofio died. Fuck you man! Most of these movies are great and who cares what the critics said? Btw, NC loved hook and an american tale, so stop bitching.

MARIO BROTHERS! Its TERRIBLE but AWESOME at the same time… and honest to god i just don’t know why!

All of these movies were crap. Except Hook. Hook is still enjoyable to me.

Robin Hood Prince of Thieves. I thought as a kid this was the best movie ever, I watched it at least 100 times, now when ive watched it I find it hard to get by Costner’s performance. And I agree with someone else, how dumb were you as a kid to think Jingle All the Way, Mario Bros and Space Jam were good movies, as a kid i assumed Mario Bros would be horrible so I never watched it and Jingle all the way? even as a kid i knew Arnold didn’t belong in a comedy. (kindergarten cop was ok for the time) and Space Jam is the only one I did see, and apart from the cartoons and people intermingling was cool it wasn’t that far removed from Paula Abdules Scat Cat, after I seen the cartoon and people together that was it for me, about a half hour in I turned it off.

Funny how these comments seem to be proving the author’s point.

That was the first time I’ve ever seen anyone bash An American Tale. As for the rest, I seen them all as a kid and thought they all sucked. If any kid had seen them and thought they were awesome then something was wrong with that child.

you come right out of a comic book

Whoever wrote this article is an ass. Overcritical about every little aspect. These movies are targeted towards kids, thats why kids love them. Fuck what the parents say, as long as the kids are happy with the movie. BTW: My 45 year old dad loves An American Tail and he never watched it until recently.

Felix The Cat: The Movie. Tried to watch it on youtube a few weeks ago, the quality depressed me in a violent way.

I’ve used Hook a dozen times in class. The kids love it. A film doesn’t necessarily have to be witty, clever or deep
written to be ‘good’. If the whole single point of the film is to be entertained and people are, I’d say it was pretty darn good.

this reveiwer is dumb as fucking shit. everyone of these movies are fucking great

Jingle all the way?, is one of the best Xmas Movies ever, aside Home alone, Die Hard and Chrismas Vacation

Kids are not dumb… Who says that

There is no such thing as a great child film, because they are all devoid of reality. They are all basically seminars in morality, with cheese and stupidity to spare. After all you can’t train the next generation of consumers to want what they can’t have and buy what they don’t need if you don’t keep them entertained.

I don’t understrand, Hook, actually followed int he line of the traditional Peter Pan play, even casting Mr. Darling as Hook as it has always been done. I understand some finer details might not be as good as it could be today, mostly special effects and stuff like that, but all in all it was a good movie for it’s time.
I think the author has their head a bit up their ass, they should pull it out. Specially with that “kids are dumb” part. Were you dumb as a kid as well? Are you willing to come out in the open and say “I agree, I was dumb as a kid!” Or are you the exception of the rule (not)?

Well, yeah, okay. Space Jam always sucked.

A.I. was a far worse Spielberg movie than Hook.

Space Jam is not terrible!!!! You must be on drugs because that was my favorite movie growing up! and I can still watch it all the time! It may not be the best movie ever, but to said it is terrible is ludicrous!!

ummm 100% wrong…Space jam and Hook were both awesome then and they are still awesome now

I have to agree wit you on Hook. I saw it as a child and loved it, but a few years ago I decided to re watch it. Honestly I was blown away that I ever thought it was that great. Not only was it horribly made, but the plot is a bit boring and nonsensical. I still love Peter Pan but I do not love this movie.

Thought for sure “Return of the Jedi” would be on this list. Star Wars went “cutesy” 16 years before Jar Jar.

get real. hook is great. No one liked mario bros the movie. your taste in movies was bad then and worse now

At no point in your rambling, incoherent writing were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone having read it is now dumber. I award you no points, and may all commentators have mercy on your pompous ass!

How did Theodore Rex not make the cut?? That movie is awful, But i was OBESSED when i was little!!

I saw “Hook” as an adult, at a time when I was facing foreclosure on my home and a number of other grown-up problems. It was much-needed escapism. I loved it then and love it today. Good messages for adults who have forgotten how to play.

Hook and space Jam are totally awesome films. You are wrong. The others i do agree, But i still watch these two films regularly.

And this is where you go wrong…Super Mario Brothers and Jingle all the Way sucked as a kid too…that movie was horrible and made no sense…as for Hook, Space Jam and American Tale…those were good and still are.

writer of this article – ROTTEN TOMATOES – 95%
what did you do anyway? just look through the tomatoes site to find high percentage kids films from the past and base your article on that?

Rufio, Rufio, Rufiooooooooooooooooooooo HEY oooooooooooooooooo
Hook is a great movie!

Dude he’s dead wrong about Mario Bros. That movie was, and still is, the shit.

I don’t know anyone nostalgic for any of these movies except MAYBE An American Tail. They were horrible then and they’re horrible now.

Jingle All the Way was beyond redemption. It was shallow, formulaic and probably made purely to motivate Christmas shopping. To this day I use this movie as a prime example of horrible acting (and a signifier of how Schwarzenegger’s talents (and integrity) have diminished.

What are this guy’s creditials? Is opinion is no better than mine and I saw these movies and they were alright.

he’s just a mean old man, without a mommy

“Hook” was great as a kid…and to this day(Yes I am 30) I watch this movie and love it. Dustin Hoffman deserved an award for this movie..Not really sure how this goes in this category at all!

Actually, there were a bevy of articles at the time raving over the highly groundbreaking animation at the time of “An American Tail”, and its historical relevance is pretty indisputable even for adults, so this article right off the bat is a FAIL. Not to mention that the music was all pretty well written, at least as good as any animated Disney flick. I can agree with a lot of points with the other movies, but right off the bat you destroy your own credibility and really just sound like another Internet troll. Get a life.

What a useless article. I don’t love the movie, but 68% on Rotten Tomatoes is absolutely hellish? Great writing.

As a child I didn’t analyze movies. I watched. Either I enjoyed them or I didn’t. I enjoyed Hook. Period.

I stopped reading when I got to Space Jam which pretty much made my child hood. Good day sir.

Jingle all the way & Space jam loved and still love them!!

Space Jam does Not suck! you suck dude.

YOU ARE SO STUPID 4 OF THESE MOVIES ARE AWESOME AND EVEN AS AN ADULT I WATCH THEM! YOU SHOULD JUST NOT WATCH MOVIES AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH

I watched Hook probably a million times as a kid… Sandlot too. Now I watch them all over again at 27 and god… they’re awful. SO bad. Jumanji was another PoS.

Aww I love space jam, even as a kid I knew who Michael Jordan was, still love this movie now I’m older, this guy clearly has his panties in a twist, these movies are awesome

And yes, ok super mario bros was slightly dodgy, but I definitely knew the actors, and I will admit I basically still own all these movies INCLUDING the super mario bros

Um… What. Ever. Hook is just as awesome today as it was when I was a kid.

Hook is a masterpiece. It doesn’t matter what idiots say.

I obsessed as a kid…….the truth hurts this movie was horrible.

I saw Hook as an adult and liked it a lot, especially the opening scenes.

Dustin Hoffman was funny in this. It wasn’t great though but it’s not as bad as u make it out to be as Speilberg’s worst movie by far was 1941.

what about major payne?

The only movie that was shown on here from my childhood was, An American tale, and I I thought it was pretty good, not great but good.

I think one of the worst films EVER was Disney’s Pocahontas. It is SOOO far off of reality that I have to find something else to do when my girls want to watch it. It is truly awful.

Sounds like someone’s a two-toned zebra-headed, slime-coated, pimple-farmin’ paramecium brain, munchin’ on his own mucus, suffering from Peter Pan envy.

i agree with the super mario bros movie being not made right cause it didnt follow anything about the game and the bad guy really wasint called bowser in the film he was called koppa i dont know how to spell it lol

I disagree with #1 entirely… ROOFEE OOOOOOOOOOO!

I actually agree about Hook. I loved its guts out when I saw it in the theater at age 12, but I recently caught it on TV and I was stunned by how terrible it was. How could I have ever loved it? I also loved An American Tale, but I haven’t watched it in decades. Still, despite the passage of time, I can still sing out a little of the “There are no cats in America and the streets are paved with cheese” song, so not all of the music is forgettable. I mean, it’s been something like twenty years since I last heard it. The other movies, I never saw. My mom hated kids’ movies and she rarely let me watch them.

With the exception of An American Tail, there’s not much here that actually stood a chance of seeming remotely good.

Well, I guess this article wasn’t aimed toward me. I have no childhood nostalgia for any of these movies, since I was in my 20s when most of them came out. Do you have a 1970s or 80s version?

Honestly, even as a kid I thought “Hook” was extremely boring and I couldn’t stand the kids in it (horrible idea for a story).

“1941″ is Spielberg’s worst movie – at least “Hook” entertained someone (kids)

“1941″ is Spielberg’s worst movie – at least “Hook” entertained someone (kids)

Somebody was seriously deprived as a child and is taking it out on Hook, which is a great family movie!

fuck you. Space Jam was awesome.

Independance Day was great when I was a teenager; it is dead to me now.

I thought criticism is given to movies one has actually seen ? If so, the author would´ve noticed that Hook was (is) a great children´s movie. I still like watching it from time to time, even when there are some very childish moments. But that doesn´t define a bad movie. Not at all. (But I definetely agree to the Mario Bros. part . )

i really didnt like it when i was a kid. Actually i saw it in the theatre with my family and some guy stole my mothers purse lol. but i thought it sucked before that

Someone grew up and is bitter he never got the chance to go to Neverland! BANGARANG mate! BANGARANG, in your all grown up and miserable face! (P.S Maggie Smith is probably the best on screen adaptation of Wendy there is, despite the fact she is playing her as an 80 year old! Dustin Hoffman’s Hook is ace as well and Robin Williams always rocks – so I don’t know how you can criticise the acting)

Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

These moview weren’t good when I was a kid…Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles should be on here somewhere…

As Ralph Baskshi said about Don Bluth, “I wouldn’t leave Disney to do Disney!”

As Ralph Baskshi said about Don Bluth, “I wouldn’t leave Disney to do Disney!”

I wasn’t a kid when “Hook” came out, and I remember that the general reaction at the time was that it was basically a dud, even amongst kids.

i watched all these with my son. and i was an adult and i loved them all (except well never saw the mario brothers one and that jingle all the way i could have done without)- but hook..and american tale..space jam (i beleve i i can fly that song still a favorite of mine) and the rest all wonderful- preferable to most adult movies violent mean horrible movies

Even if I was going to agree with anything he said here, how in the actual FUCK do you put Hook at number 1 instead of Mario Bros? Damn you straight to hell.

Never heard of An American Tail (probably because I’m not American?) but what the hell is wrong with Jingle All The Way? People are far too critical of fun cheesy movies. (Note I never saw it as a kid and only caught it on tv last xmas. Schwarzenegger comedies are all brilliant.)

Ok Ok yes Hook has a 31 on rotten tomatoes from critics but the audience the ones who pay to see the film rate it at a %71 on rotten tomatoes. So lets see I could take what a few critics say as the truth or the rest of the audience tough choice for me…

I actually enjoyed this film as a sequel. It had some echoes of the original in terms of plot progression, but I would hardly call it a repeat performance.

I loved Hoffman’s performance in this and this cemented Bob Hoskins as being the best portrayal of Smee there has ever been (appropriately noticed in the SyFy prequel to Peter Pan, Neverland, where Hoskins reprised his role as Smee).

I do agree with some of these movies (Jingle All The Way was terrible, An American Tail was forgettable, Super Mario Bros had a horrible script, etc.) But Hook was actually a very decent movie. Was it great? Not really, it did have its flaws. But I would call it slightly mediocre at worst.

I stopped reading at Space Jam. First you pick An American Tail which is a great movie. What criticism do you have about it? Its boring. Pretty subjective don’t you think. Specially considering the fact that you don’t offer any real cinematic analysis to back up your claim. OK so you found it boring. Were all allowed our opinions. Even when we are pretentiins internet writers who are dead inside.

Then you follow up with two movies that are horrible, have always been horrible, are known to be horrible by most people including children and have never been cherished by anyone. They were jokes when they came out and still are so again you fail to provide a real follow up to your premise.

Seriously though. Who gave you a column.

Fievel goes west was way better

I can just say i’ve watched most of these movies AFTER I turned 21 and Hook and American Tale both hold up.
The others I love because they are so bad. it’s like Last Action hero .. Or Labyrinth … Yeah they may not be Pan’s Labyrinth or Last of the Mohicans .. But I still love em.

Yeah, this dude…. no idea what he’s talking about. All of these movies are good, I still vouch that, and just about everything he tries to jab at was either done on purpose and isn’t a flaw or its just a reeeally meaningless flaw the size of which means nothing. And a number of them don’t even exist.

Apparently,movies,and kids,were invented around 1980.
At least according to TJ BarnYard.
Some of us grew up with Swiss Family Robinson,Darby O’Gill,Blackbeard’s Ghost.
You know,before computers needed to generate the actors?

Hook is a great movie. How can you not like Robin Williams. It is also the only thing Dustin Hoffman has done that is good, mainly because you can’t tell it is him.