Andrew Tate is launching a comic book series, and the first issue is almost $100

It’s one thing to not have something on your 2023 bingo card, but it’s quite another when you actually become thankful that you didn’t get the card that had the most hopelessly dystopian developments on it.

That’s the sort of thankful many might be feeling at the moment, as Andrew Tate has announced a comic book series of all things. And while it’s usually wise advice to not knock something without trying it, we’re going to go out on a limb and say that even without the exorbitant price tag of the first issue — it’s not going to be worth anyone’s time.

Per Dexerto, the hilariously delusional series, titled Top G: Breaking Illusions, stars Tate himself as he goes toe-to-tumor with “the forces of the Matrix and corporate tyranny,” because he’s definitely someone who’s suffering under the ruthless dynamics of capitalism, of course.

Now, the simple fact that Tate has a comic book series coming out would be a sign of the end times on its own, but when you further consider the fact that the first issue – not the first volume, the first issue – has a price tag of $97, it becomes quickly apparent that there will be no way back for us soon.

A single spark of hope remains, however; given that Tate fights against “the Matrix” in the series, then perhaps it’s entirely possibly that Neo will show up at some point, meaning we’d get to see Keanu Reeves’ likeness punch Tate in the face with impunity. Now that’s something I’d pay $97 to see.