TikTok is a powerful for people to share their stories and find community. This is exactly how Charli Hayes has built her platform, by sharing her perspective as an adoptee and sexual abuse victim. In a recent video, Charli shared the book that her adopted family published when she was nine about their journey to adopt her.
It’s a children’s book filled with colorful pictures that replicate real family photos, videos, landmarks and pages of a light-hearted rhyming message about why adoption was so great for their family.
Conveniently, this lighthearted story forgets the detail that their adopted daughter was repeatedly assaulted by a family member from the age of seven until she ran away from home. Understandably, Charli is outraged, as is her comment section. One person even suggested that she make a couple of edits to the book and send it back their way.
There were also details in her read-through of the book that commenters found interesting. The first is that the book inexplicably changed perspectives and tenses halfway through (not usually the mark of quality literature) and that the book talked about how her adopted brother wanted a sibling so they just went and got him one. Some people likened it to how you would ask for and receive a puppy or a toy, not a sister.
Charli has made a lot of videos about her experience as an adoptee but more recently detailed the story of the days leading up to her escape.
She had been the victim of sexual assault for a large portion of her childhood and eventually decided to try and tell trusted adults even though she had been told not to. She also told her aunt who she says was very supportive, but who eventually also told Charli’s adoptive mother, which got Charli in trouble.
Because of the continued abuse and lack of support from her family, Charli ran away in the middle of the night in 2018.
People who have had similar experiences flock to the comment sections of many of her videos to share their support, lived experiences, and encouragement. And all of them can see the irony and tragedy in her family’s book, in comparison to Charlie’s actual lived experience.
According to RAINN, one in nine girls under the age of eighteen, like Charli, experience sexual abuse and 82% of all sexual abuse victims fall into the same category. As is the case with Charli’s abuser, 34% of sexual abusers are family members of the victim. If you or someone you love is experiencing sexual abuse you can call the national sexual abuse hotline at 800-656-HOPE.
Published: Apr 1, 2024 02:52 pm