‘It’s just all so toxic and I know that we can do better’: Lily Allen responds to the death threats and backlash she received after returning her puppy

Adding a pet to the family should never be a snap decision. Like children, young animals need ample love, clear rules, and a generous mentor to help them grow into their best selves.

Lily Allen and her husband, David Harbour, learned the true cost of a rambunctious pup the hard way after their rescue pup destroyed several hundred dollars’ worth of important documents. No one wants their stuff destroyed by a pet, but the simple podcast anecdote turned into a PR nightmare for the singer after the internet came for her in force following the rehoming story.

What did Lily Allen do to her dog?

Pop singer Lily Allen has found herself in hot water after a simple anecdote has turned animal lovers across the web against her. In a story shared on her podcast, “Miss Me,” Allen told fans she and husband, Stranger Things actor David Harbour adopted a pooch during the COVID-19 pandemic, but the rescue had a few more quirks than the family was prepared for.

She told listeners, “She ate all three of our passports, and they had our visas.” Allen shares two daughters with her ex-husband, Sam Cooper, who still lives in England. “I couldn’t get them back to see their dad for, like, four months, five months because this f—- dog had eaten the passports.”

Custody arrangements can take months to years to work out, depending on how well divorcees get along. Failing to adhere to the arrangement can result in a renegotiation, loss of custody, cost thousands in legal fees, and even jail time for the uncooperative parent.  

But if there is anything that animal lovers hate almost as much as they love their pets, it’s people who don’t love their pets enough. The jovial nature with which Allen told the story had armchair warriors everywhere ready to fight. The singer had no choice but to leap onto X.com to clear the air. She claimed the incident was the straw that broke the camel’s back, and that the pup was a “very badly behaved dog, and I really tried very hard with her, but it didn’t work out.”

Why are people threatening to kill Lily Allen?

If there is anything the internet hates, it’s anyone the collective mind believes has harmed an animal. PETA, the questionable animal rights group known for aggressive media stunts, joined the bloodbath that Allen claims started with “clickbait articles” published by Mail Online.

As Allen wrote a small novel to clear her name, commenters found plenty of reasons to blast the singer. “Literally absolutely nothing in this Tweet makes you look any better,” one wrote. “A dog is family, you don’t desert family,” preached another. Many called her “lazy,” “an idiot,” and implored her to, “please never have another dog.” But even as more negative Tweets rolled in, plenty of animal lovers took Allen’s side.

But Allen’s final paragraph threw fuel on the fire.

“All you are doing by engaging with these stories is making more money for people who profit from sewing division and tearing us all apart. In the same way that misinformed people acted on distorted propaganda that led to the racially driven xenophobic riots we’ve seen recently in the UK, it’s just all so toxic and I know that we can do better.”

And just like that, the Brits exploded, “You mocked the country that raised and gave you everything,” they raged, turning the dog-related-kerfuffle into a full-blown fight for home and country. “Comparing the reaction to race riots OMFG Lilly Allen the martyr,” cackled another. Commenters were fed up with her attempts to make herself the victim.

Maybe I’m simply a jaded American living in a timeline where Kristi Noem can maintain her gubernatorial seat despite shooting her dog in a ditch, but rehoming a pup doesn’t seem like a career-ending event. Perhaps the best thing she can do is duck her head and wait a week until the next hapless celebrity martyr makes themselves look like a jerk on the internet.