World War II has begun, and Adolf Hitler and his Nazi troops are wreaking havoc across Europe. Britain is his next target, and he’s softening them up with bombing before he launches an assault across the English Channel.
Allied forces are considering every available option to stop him, but in one quiet laboratory they’ve decided that bullets, poison, or explosives simply aren’t good enough. Their weapon of choice? Estrogen. Their plan? The complete force-feminization of Hitler!
The germ of the idea came when the Allies began analyzing Paula Hitler, Adolf’s younger sister. Adolf didn’t think much of his sibling, dismissing her as a “stupid goose” who didn’t share his wild ambitions and was happy to quietly work as a secretary. So maybe, just maybe, if Hitler could be made more like Paula, he’d lose his lust for power and settle down to a quiet desk job! Bing bong, war over, flawless victory.
Professor Brian Ford of Cardiff University uncovered documents detailing the plan, which confirmed that spies had access to Hitler’s food. Simply poisoning him wouldn’t work, as he had food-tasters to prevent that. But estrogen? Very doable. As Professor Ford explains:
“There were agents who would be able to get it into his food – it would have been entirely possible. [There would have been] no mileage to putting poison in his food because they would immediately fall victim to it. Sex hormones were a different matter.”
Hitler was a vegetarian and specifically enjoyed carrots, so the estrogen would have been administered through special carrots that would have looked and tasted exactly like normal carrots – to the untrained eye (also tongue).
Hitler wouldn’t have noticed much at first, but he may have suspected something was up when he developed an impressive pair of breasts. Der Führer is not supposed to have a bangin’ rack, so presumably this would have damaged his reputation with the German people. And that famous moustache? Not sticking around.
He’s going girlmode!
But the real aim was to feminize Hitler’s brain. Secret estrogen in his food would have drastically affected his state of mind, resulting in symptoms like depression, sadness, lack of motivation, and mood swings. It’s worth clarifying that transgender people who purposefully take hormones generally report improved mental health.
But Hitler wasn’t trans (well, as far as we know), so he wouldn’t be having a great time on estrogen. But, frankly, I’m not sure making Hitler more emotionally volatile is the hottest idea to end World War II. It’s unknown why this plan was never put into motion, perhaps it was just too bizarre for top brass to authorize.
All that said, this plan was seriously considered and studied. Perhaps somewhere out there, there’s an alternative world where Hitler suddenly decided that, actually, he was a bit over conquering Europe, and it’d be much nicer to settle down, become a typist, find a cozy Berlin apartment, buy a shark plushie, and get a cat. Just don’t call her Adolf or you’re going to get such a telling off!
Published: Jan 14, 2026 10:39 am