Reddit user Due_Database916 says their 63-year-old mother has lost roughly $650k of her life savings in a WhatsApp romance scam involving cryptocurrency, a type of long-running fraud known as a “pig butchering scam,” and now refuses to accept that she was deceived. The post details years of financial instability followed by what the user describes as the most devastating loss yet.
Due_Database wrote, “She has a history of doing this (in other forms) dating back to when I was young. She has not and will not see a doctor or hand over control of her finances. She’s still working and seemingly of sound mind. But I worry she will find a way to give the rest of it away. I also don’t know how she’ll afford living, and I don’t know what to do.”
According to the the post, their mother’s past financial decisions included emptying her 401(k) in 2007 to donate to a church and losing $150,000 in 2020 on antiques that turned out to be fake. Despite those setbacks, she had rebuilt her finances through investments and rental income.
As recently as last year, she owned two paid-off rental properties, had nearly paid off her primary home, and still had about $200,000 in her retirement account. “Unfortunately, most of that is now gone,” the post states.
The WhatsApp messages start
The most recent incident began when a stranger contacted the woman through WhatsApp. Over weeks or months, the person built trust and what she believed was a romantic connection, despite never meeting in person. Eventually, the scammer persuaded her to liquidate nearly everything.
“She pulled equity out of the homes, emptied her 401k and even borrowed 40k from a close high school friend,” Due_Database916 wrote. “In total, about 650k was sent to this person through a crypto wallet, leaving my mom with almost nothing.”
This type of fraud is widely known as a pig butchering scam, a term used by law enforcement and anti-scam groups to describe a long con that originated in organized scam networks overseas. The name comes from the Chinese phrase “sha zhu pan,” meaning “killing the pig plate.”
In the metaphor, the victim is the “pig.” Scammers “fatten” them emotionally by building trust, friendship, or romance over time before “butchering” them financially by convincing them to send large sums into fake crypto investments. Unlike quick-hit scams, these schemes can unfold over months and are designed to extract as much money as possible from a single person.
Due_Database916 says efforts to confront their mother have led to conflict. She reportedly defends her decisions by saying money spent on happiness is worth it and accuses her children of treating her as inferior. “She claims we’re treating her as beneath her and she justifies it by saying she feels free and happy and that any amount of money spent of happiness is worth it,” the post reads.
Due_Database916 also shared that their mother has spoken in the past about depression and suicidal thoughts, making it difficult for the family to distinguish between denial, manipulation, and potential mental health concerns.
Options are limited
Commenters offered sobering advice. Some said the family may have to set firm boundaries and accept that they cannot stop her if she refuses help. “You can’t help someone who willingly throws money into scammer’s pockets,” one commenter wrote.
Others stressed that reporting the scam may be the only slim chance of recovering any funds. They recommended filing reports with local law enforcement and the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center at IC3.gov. Commenters also pointed to Operation Shamrock, a nonprofit that helps victims of pig butchering scams document cases and report them properly.
Several noted that authorities have increasingly been able to trace and freeze stolen cryptocurrency, but only if victims report the crime quickly. Due_Database916 ended their post in frustration and heartbreak: “Any advice is sincerely appreciated or just anyone who’s been in the situation before. I’m pretty crushed.”
As pig butchering scams surge worldwide, the emotional manipulation involved often makes it harder for victims to recognize the fraud, leaving families struggling not only with financial fallout, but with convincing loved ones that they were scammed at all.
Published: Jan 29, 2026 12:10 pm