‘NO FUN – NOT WORTH IT!!’: Jeffrey Epstein ‘suicide note’ finally made public

A clear majority of Americans are certain Jeffrey Epstein was murdered and did not commit suicide. An August 2025 poll indicated that 75% of people believe he was “murdered to protect powerful people”, with 39% of them considering that “definitely true”.

It’s easy to see why. Epstein’s death was extraordinarily suspicious, complete with unexplained gaps in CCTV footage, questionable behavior from his guards, strange goings on in and around the prison, and odd lapses in materials allowed to inmates.

On top of all that, you don’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out a motive. As the last year has proven, Epstein had a mountain of dirt on a legion of powerful and wealthy people – people who would have been absolutely terrified of any plea deal he might cut with authorities to reduce his sentence.

Now we have a new piece of the puzzle. A federal judge has unsealed what’s alleged to be Epstein’s suicide note, which was scrawled on a piece of paper discovered by Epstein’s cellmate Nicholas Tartaglione (a quintuple murderer and former police officer who Epstein claimed attacked him). The note was written weeks before Epstein’s eventual death and, if legitimate, would give us a window into his mind:

Breaking News: A suicide note purported to be written by Jeffrey Epstein was released after being sealed for years. https://t.co/nbl5MY8ps2

— The New York Times (@nytimes) May 6, 2026

“They investigated me for months — FOUND NOTHING!!!. It is a treat to be able to choose one’s time to say goodbye. Watcha want me to do — Bust out cryin!! NO FUN – NOT WORTH IT!!”

“Watcha want me to do — Bust out cryin!!”

As someone who has spent years covering every part of Epstein’s crimes and the cover-up, I should point out:

* This is NOTHING like his handwriting or syntax

* This reads like a Trump tweet

* This was allegedly handed in by a former cellmate long after his death.

* That… https://t.co/fP30Sf5X9x

— Adam Cochran (adamscochran.eth) (@adamscochran) May 6, 2026

Tartaglione apparently held onto the note as a potential defense against assault allegations from Epstein, with it being sealed until now due to attorney-client privilege. Reports indicate that his lawyers used experts to prove that this is Epstein’s handwriting, though their conclusions don’t appear to have been made public.

Well, it’s certainly self-serving, cowardly, and garbled enough to be Epstein’s words, though the note is not signed and has not been verified.

One thing’s for certain: this will only stoke the fires of conspiracy rather than quench them. Epstein himself maintained he wasn’t suicidal right up to his death, though if he planned to kill himself, he would naturally lie about that.

Maybe one day we’ll know for sure whether Epstein was literally murdered, whether he was intentionally given the means and opportunity to kill himself, or whether the official story is actually true. But, whatever the facts are, it seems that most Americans aren’t going to change their minds that some extremely powerful people decided it would be best for everyone if Epstein’s secrets died with him.

If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, please seek help. You can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or visit their website for support and resources.