Alien Abduction Insurance Policies Skyrocket Prior To Area 51 Raid

Here’s your latest Florida man headline: Florida man sells alien abduction insurance, actually makes money.

And how is that possible, you may ask? Well, talks of extra-terrestrial creatures have been spiking recently in the midst of social media wackiness. Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the last several weeks, you know that a Facebook event was created that’s invited anyone willing to storm Area 51 – the rumored sanctuary for space-being research – later this fall.

The prank – which its founder’s publicly admitted is, in fact, a prank – has taken on a life of its own. At the time of writing, nearly 2 million people have signed up saying they’ll be in Nevada come September 20th, with another 1.4 million interested.

Of course, this is something to be taken with a grain of salt. The basic characteristics of the plot, which include racing past military artillery with a Naruto run, all point towards a big joke. And a lot of people have treated it as such. But there are plenty who haven’t. According to The Washington Post, all the surrounding hotels have been booked on that Friday.

Thankfully, Mike St. Lawrence, the owner of the St. Lawrence Insurance Agency offering this abduction policy, is one of the people not taking the event seriously. Having being very open about working in the “humor business,” the “insurance man” has adapted his financial strategy to include the upcoming raid. Very bluntly, his website reads it’s for those who “get in, but don’t come out.”

St. Lawrence is obviously messing around, and definitely not trying to pull one on anybody. Having become a small public figure and appearing on TV for interviews several times, he’s even used his tiny celebrity to encourage people not to participate.

“If I could give advice, it would be to stay home because this is a military site and they probably take blocking people from getting in seriously.”

You got to love it when the only people who’re making sense in this story are the pranksters. Oh, and the Air Force.

Though everything about St. Lawrence’s site dictates he has a strong sense of humor – including a $10 million policy in which the beneficiary receives $1 for the next 10 million years – he’s also said that sales have picked up following the popularity of the raid.

Frankly, this is getting a little too real for my taste, but we’ll have to wait and see what actually happens at Area 51 on September 20th. And if you’re one of those people actually considering participating in this, be sure to check out St. Lawrence’s site for more information.