Robert Downey Jr. and Susan Downey have reflected on the early stages of their relationship, with the actor saying he wouldn’t be married if Susan “knew the depths of my depravity.”
The Hollywood couple spoke of their marriage and joint production company, Team Downey, as part of a profile feature for The Hollywood Reporter. In it, Robert looks back on his courting of the producer after they met on the set of the 2003 Halle Berry thriller, Gothika. At the time, Susan had taken on a producer role for the film while working for Silver Pictures, and Robert starred in the movie alongside Berry and Penelope Cruz. It was while working on the movie that Robert started pursuing Susan, and asked her out on a date three times.
Since it marked Susan’s first full-credit producing job, she was at first hesitant to complicate her budding career by getting involved with one of the film’s stars. She also thought Downey “was interesting but weird” so put off agreeing to a date for some time. Also complicating matters was Robert’s sobriety journey. Gothika marked the actor’s first major role after enduring a tumultuous few years that included being arrested and incarcerated, as well as driving under the influence and being found with drugs on his person. This, of course, presented a problem for Susan, who admitted to never having tried drugs in her life.
In any case, Robert said that at the time of filming Gothika, his “exit strategy [from drug use] was in process,” and he was sober enough that Susan eventually agreed to a date. After just three months, Robert was already asking Susan to marry him, even though he wasn’t yet divorced from his former partner, Deborah Falconer. Susan ultimately agreed to marry the Iron Man actor, but insisted on a years-long engagement and delivered an ultimate ahead of the nuptials. Susan outlined that if Robert wanted to get married, he would have to give up drugs completely.
“Addiction was so foreign to me,” Susan told The Hollywood Reporter. “I was incredibly ignorant of the hold it had on people.” According to Robert, this ignorance was a good thing, because “if [Susan] knew the depths of my depravity, we would not be sitting here,” the actor said. Thankfully, Downey upheld his end of the ultimatum, and the pair married in 2005. They reflected more broadly on their relationship since then, saying they outlined a two-week rule where they wouldn’t go a fortnight without seeing one another.
Then, they vowed to spend even more time together by taking on multiple productions as the co-founders of Team Downey. Some notable titles produced by Team Downey include The Judge, Dolittle, and the perpetually in-development Sherlock Holmes 3. “I had someone who came in as a tornado, this creative, beautiful ball of insane energy and passion,” Susan said of her husband, “and it completely opened me up.”
The pair have welcomed two children, with daughter Avri born in 2014 and son Exton born in 2012. Robert also has one child with Falconer, 31-year-old Indio, whom he co-parents with both Susan and Falconer. More recently, Robert praised Susan while accepting the Best Supporting Actor trophy for his role in Oppenheimer, saying his wife “loved me back to life and that’s why I’m here.”