There is nothing on this Earth that can grant endorphin hits quite as potently as canceled plans. We all know the cycle — agree to Friday plans on a Wednesday, only for Friday to roll around and catch you in a mood unfit for social interaction. You rattle off real and imagined inconveniences as excuses, only for your friend to assure you that they can remedy them. The nerve of some people!
In any case, if you’re in the market for one of the deadliest verbal WMSWs (weapons of mass social withdrawal) in history, look no further than one Scarlett Johansson, whose strategy for dealing with unwanted selfie-hunters has quickly become one of her finest contributions to society this side of Marriage Story.
Per a recent cover interview with InStyle, Johansson mused on the sacrifice of privacy one must make as a famous person, later explaining her personal policy on taking photos with fans whenever she isn’t working. As you can imagine, it’s a “no exceptions” sort of policy.
It really offends a lot of people. It doesn’t mean I’m not appreciative, of course, that people are fans, or happy to see me. But I always say to people, ‘I’m not working.’ [And that means] I don’t want to be identified as being in this time and place with you. I’m doing my own thing.
But it was that penultimate sentence that caused the denizens of the website formerly known as Twitter to fall in love with the actress in a whole new way.
The phrase is indeed a Swiss Army Knife of a boundary-setter. Want to tell someone what you really think of them? “I don’t want to be identified as being in this time and place with you.” Need to put your foot down on a now-undesirable social commitment? “I don’t want to be identified as being in this time and place with you.” Looking to prey upon a stranger’s insecurities in the most surreal way possible? Hit ’em with the good ol’ IDWTBIABITTAPWY before marching away.
Frankly, good on Johansson for sticking so rigorously to this policy. It may offend selfie-happy hopefuls, but there’s something to be said about how we’ve allowed the phenomenon of celebrity to fuel a culture of parasocial brain rot. Johansson’s policy challenges this.
Suffice to say she probably has to exercise this policy on a frequent basis. Johansson currently stands as the most lucrative actress of all time, with her films having grossed $15.4 billion (due in no small part to her time as Black Widow in the Marvel Cinematic Universe). Only one performer has a higher box office total, and that’s Johansson’s fellow MCU legacy figure Samuel L. Jackson (whose combined box office gross stands at a whopping $27 billion).
Indeed, Johansson’s everpresence in the blockbuster scene means there’s probably no shortage of fans to fend off, and her reach is only getting bigger. She’ll be stepping into the Jurassic World franchise this summer at the behest of Jurassic World Rebirth, all while continuing her new era as a Wes Anderson regular with The Phoenician Scheme, due later this spring. Elsewhere, she’ll soon be making her directorial debut with the June Squibb-led Eleanor the Great. That has yet to receive a release date, despite filming having wrapped in April 2024.
Published: Mar 12, 2025 01:55 pm