‘I just knew he wasn’t there’: Mom recounts the day her autistic son went missing — two days before his death

In the aftermath of the death of her son, an Australian mother stressed just how important it can be to ensure an autistic child is sufficiently monitored during their playtime. Jazmine Spence, 35, is finally comfortable opening up about a double tragedy that happened in 2023 when her autistic son went missing from daycare, then two days later, in an unrelated incident, the child drowned.

There was already a recent story about a mother who was so overwhelmed by her autistic child harming themselves that she lost her temper and actually killed him. The inexcusable situation highlighted just how stressed parents are by the demanding nature of raising a child who has such special needs. Perhaps that’s why they end up being tempted by politicians offering silver bullets that can cure the situation without much hassle — some parents even reportedly willing to try bleach as a cure for autism.

Spence’s son, Theodore, 5 at the time, was one of the children being taken care of by Busy Bee Early Learning Center in Brisbane. On Feb. 17, 2023, Jazmine arrived at the childcare with her partner for what was supposed to be a routine pickup at about 5:55 p.m. “I instantly just knew he wasn’t there,” Jazmine said after seeing the playground with no trace of Theo.

Panic immediately ensued. According to 7News, Jazmine and her partner Luke immediately started looking in the neighboring areas, asking security guards and passersby if they had seen their son. Theodore was nonverbal, so it meant that he couldn’t even express who he was to people who must have seen him alone.

Theodore was soon found by someone at a busy four-lane road at around 6 p.m. and returned to his parents. Jazmine said of the ordeal, “The fact he got through the first road and then across that little side street and then to that corner — it’s honestly a miracle he wasn’t killed by a car that day or seriously hurt.”

Theo was supposed to be under one-on-one care, and that was a lapse by the care center. While there were no criminal charges, the childcare center was ultimately fined the hefty fee of AUD 12,500 plus additional court fees. To this day, Jazmine still thinks there should have been more consequences, such as a conviction.

Eventually, the family decided to move to Ipswich, where they could get more support from their extended family. Jazmine was under the impression that the move would give her peace of mind and some safety for Theodore because more caring people would help out in watching him.

On Feb. 19, two days after the event at the childcare center, Luke, Jazmine, and Theo were setting up shop in their new home in Ipswich. With nowhere to place Theo, she left him in his car seat as they unpacked. Minutes later, she heard commotion. When she went to check Theo’s car seat, he was nowhere to be found. They eventually discovered Theo had drowned.

Raising a child in this condition is incredibly difficult and such a steep learning curve. And that’s why it’s so important for these families to trust science — as slow as it grinds — because quick fixes just won’t do it.

Jazmine still hasn’t moved from their home in Ipswich. She explained, “It will be three years this February. I can’t leave. It’s my home. It’s Theo’s last home. I feel like if I leave here, I’m leaving him.”