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8 Film Franchises That Really Need To Die

As a fan of film, there's nothing sadder than watching flailing franchises spew out uninspired efforts to keep the box-office numbers ticking over. When the property becomes an obligation rather than a privilege, this is where courageous conversations need to be had. You know, the "it's time to say goodbye because you suck" speech.

The Fast And The Furious

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Franchise entries: The Fast and the Furious (2001), 2 Fast 2 Furious (2003), The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006), Fast & Furious (2009), Fast Five (2011), Fast & Furious 6 (2013), Furious 7 (2015), The Fate of the Furious (2017)

Let’s not kid ourselves here. The only reason we even bother to watch these films anymore is for the glorious, death-defying car stunts. The story itself no longer matters, no one knows what the characters’ motives are, and the plot is made up on the fly so it can still be marketed as a movie. That’s the truth in a nutshell.

Yet, with the last two films raking in more than a billion dollars each, it’s unlikely that Universal gives a crap what a hack like me says about it. Releasing a Fast and the Furious film is like printing money with unlimited paper, so there’s literally no chance this series will see its demise until the audience stops showing up at the cinema.

The franchise keeps Vin Diesel gainfully employed, so that’s a positive, I guess. Maybe if Marvel sweetens his Guardians of the Galaxy deal, he’ll bounce and subsequently kill the series. Here’s hoping that Kevin Feige reads this and does us a solid here.

Likelihood of being cancelled: Zilch.

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