What with Avengers: Infinity War becoming only the fourth motion picture ever to conquer the elusive $2 billion plateau, and the Marvel Cinematic Universe, on the whole, exceeding $17 billion – and counting – hauled in at the worldwide box office, it would indeed appear the sky’s the limit for the highest grossing film franchise of all time. That said, the world of moviemaking ain’t all sunshine and rainbows, especially when your boss is the House of Mouse.
Courtesy of Screen Rant, we’ve been granted a sneak peek at the production process, à la Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory, and what it will ultimately cost you to become a member of the MCU. Some of the rules you’ll see below make sense, while others may have you scratching your head, but either way, Kevin Feige and co. must adhere to all of these so long as they answer to Disney.
Fake Script & The Windowless Room
Much like every other studio in the biz, Disney doesn’t want their content spoiled. As a result, you’ll not be given a script to take home. The only time you’ll be handed a script is in a windowless room, where you must check your cell phone at the door. Oh, and the screenplay you’re reading may not even be a real one.
Maintain the Disney Image
The House of Mouse must maintain a family-friendly image; therefore, those entrusted with said image must act in accordance. Clearly, this is something James Gunn learned the hard way.
Release Date
No two Disney IP can be released in the same month.
No Smoking
Under no circumstance can smoking be depicted on screen.
Strict Diet and Exercise
Each MCU superhero must adhere to a strict, two-hour-long training regimen each and every day, at minimum.
Easter Eggs and References
You know how Ultron sang “I’ve Got No Strings?” Yeah, that wasn’t a coincidence. Each film released under the Disney banner must contain allusion to other Disney IP.
No Beheading
Because the House of Mouse, much like the rest of the world, can’t help but view beheading as far too gruesome, it must never be enacted on screen, which is why, I suppose, Thor didn’t go for the head.
No DC
Once you’ve signed on to become a member of the MCU, you can no longer promote a rival product, unless killed off or released from your contract.
Secret Van
You may or may not be stuffed into an unmarked van before heading to a shooting location, where you’ll be informed on a need-to-know basis.
On Call 24/7
Once under contract, you need to make yourself immediately accessible should the need for reshoots, cameo, public appearance, etc., arise.
Sure, a lot of what’s listed above may seem over the top, but, it’s hard to argue with success, right? What do you think, though? Are any of these rules that Disney makes Marvel Studios follow too extreme? As always, feel free to share your thoughts down below.