Horror Pick: The Cabin In The Woods (2011)
I’m going against my own rule this week by picking something more mainstream, as I’m sure most horror audiences have at least HEARD of The Cabin In The Woods, and since this masterpiece has been sitting on Netflix’s Watch Instantly roster for a while, you’ve had ample time to watch Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard geek out hardcore for our enjoyment. Wait, you STILL haven’t? Well, you’re missing out on of the best horror movies of the decade, a statement I stand behind 100% whenever someone tries to tell me otherwise. Come at me, bro!
The Cabin In The Woods succeeds at exploiting the horror genre for every bit of potential available, utilizing long-standing stereotypes to create a wholly unique experience that becomes a hybrid of almost every subgenre possible. At first glance, we expect nothing but a generic backwoods slasher movie, but what unfolds becomes more of a “Choose Your Own Adventure” book from hell. Government agencies, balance keeping, sacrifice, insane gore, crazier designs – Whedon’s story takes something typical and churns out something special.
All horror movies need to watch The Cabin In The Woods for an exemplary lesson in how to deliver the perfect payoff, as an epic monster mash has become one of the crowning moments in recent horror memory. I’ll remain entirely vague here for those lost souls who somehow haven’t been introduced to this magnificent film, but just understand that Goddard and Whedon know exactly where they want to get viewers, holding an explosive ace up their sleeve, and when the chaos ensues, it’s like the most epic dustup song just dropped the bass. If you’re a metal fan, that’s the equivalent to hearing the most brutal, thrashing breakdown imaginable. I’ve seen the film a billion times since I bought a copy, and I still get giddy knowing the insanity I’m about to witness.
Despite having the hunky Chris Hemsworth and some other hot young characters for us to ogle, everyone has a blast fighting their way through The Cabin In The Woods – especially a lovable stoner played by the very talented Fran Kranz. Although these doomed vacationers seem to be the main characters, it’s veteran actors Bradley Whitford and Richard Jenkins who steal every single scene with awkward dance moves and quick, lightning wit. Again, revealing their parts will spoil story material, so just take my word on how unforgettable these two are and see for yourself.
The Cabin In The Woods deserves the highest praise, and should be watched immediately. There’s nothing left to say. Featuring one of the most show-stopping climaxes in recent memory, the ballsy confidence on display becomes the most intriguing factor of all because everyone involved knows how good of a movie they’re making, and they aren’t afraid to show it. I pity any horror fan who still hasn’t seen this Rubik’s Cube of horror awesomeness.