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Whatever Goes To Hell, Stays In Hell: The 13 Worst Horror Movies Of 2013

My list is pretty varied this year, containing reboots gone awry, sequels that aren't really sequels, independent films that forget to be creative, mainstream flops, and novel adaptations with the worst of intentions. There wasn't one finger to point, but multiple fingers pointing in all different directions, including at one of the most iconic horror directors to come out of the Giallo era of Italian horror filmmaking. Don't define 2013 by these duds, as there are PLENTY of horror movies I'm going to be praising unconditionally, but just do yourself a favor and don't become another victim claimed by these grueling headaches.

4) Fright Night 2: New Blood

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Alright, a terrible remake is one thing, but a terrible remake masking itself as a sequel to a much more superior remake produced only two years ago is a completely different beast. Fright Night 2: New Blood isn’t a follow up to the Anton Yelchin/Colin Farrell starring rehash from 2011, but instead it’s yet another remake of the same exact story with different actors, a different setting, and a confusingly inferior production that might be one of the most unnecessary films of 2013. I’m not talking just horror, I’m talking in all of cinema. I rather enjoyed Craig Gillespie’s remake, as it brought new life to a vampire story that fights back against the Twilight era, but Edurdo Rodriguez’s film does absolutely nothing to raise the dead. Rodriguez’s entry is about as dead as a doornail, bested in every sense by Gillespie’s.

The first red flag to me occurred when actor Chris Waller appeared as Evil Ed in full human form, meaning he wasn’t taking over for Christopher Mintz-Plasse’s previous character, but instead re-inventing him. Why would he need to be re-invented? Well, I found that out the hard way, as I sat through a Fright Night re-imagining that stumbled down an all-too-familiar path. More vampires in hiding, more pre-teen relationships being threatened by dark forces, except this time instead of Colin Farrell we got the smokin’ Jamie Murray as our vampire antagonist. Not even the salacious vixen could save us viewers from a lackluster fate though, as all the pools of blood and sexy girl-on-girl vampire action couldn’t make Fright Night 2: New Blood a movie worthy of replacing Craig Gillespie’s far, far better effort.

With all the plot points and characters this time around, there’s only one question raised by Fright Night 2: New Blood: Why?

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