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‘I almost cried tears of joy’: Michael Myers slaying in a whole different way is the ‘Halloween’ reboot we didn’t know we needed

He's got a little sass in his walk this time around.

Images via @stormigee / TikTok/X

When you think of fear-inducing horror villains who possess a particular sass about them, Michael Myers is likely not at the forefront of your mind. But perhaps this now-viral TikTok video will completely alter your perception about the iconic Halloween baddie.

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And, yes, I’m definitely not using the term “baddie” loosely here, seeing as Myers is looking as fierce as ever in the aforementioned video, which is now making its rounds and garnering plenty of laughs in the process on both TikTok and X. The head-turning video depicts a woman fresh “out of the strip club” as she walks to her car in a relatively quiet parking garage, although she has yet to realize that Myers is stalking her from behind while she talks on the phone to a friend.

And while this pulse-pounding scenario is undoubtedly a nightmare that comes to life whenever it’s showcased on the silver screen, this real-life encounter is nothing short of hilarious and ridiculously campy. After insisting that she feels as though she’s “being watched,” Myers uses a tall, black boot to kick her from behind as she falls to the ground in horror. Oh yes, the spooky season is here to stay.

“Taste my stripper heel,” the woman shouts back from the floor as her heel collides with Myers’ leather boot. It’s certainly an art imitates life sort of moment that looks as if it’s almost straight out of Michelangelo’s The Creation of Adam painting. As if the video couldn’t possibly get any better, the vibe takes an immediate turn as the woman applauds Myers’ boots and everything “slay” about his gender-bending mannerisms and fierce march down the imaginary catwalk.

Of course, this description simply does not do this entire ordeal justice, because seeing Myers fiercely stomp down on the concrete of a parking garage is everything I’ve ever wanted from the Halloween franchise. Forget chasing Jamie Lee Curtis’ Laurie Strode through the Haddonfield community — witnessing Myers wearing large black boots that resemble Patrick Star’s leather heels is a sight that unequivocally cannot be topped.

Given how masterfully iconic this video truly is, it’s no wonder the general reaction has been insanely positive and uplifting, with many on X echoing that “Michael came to slay” while others insisted that Michael better wear boots in the next Halloween movie or we won’t be watching. I mean, another Halloween movie is only imminent at this point, right?

Now, seeing a legendary horror villain is almost too shocking for the human brain to fully comprehend — let’s be honest, we couldn’t imagine Jason Voorhees in these boots — but we somehow can’t get enough of the aesthetic of the blue mechanic jumpsuit with the leather black boots. Never mind that Myers is marching to the beat of his own drum in the movies, it’s about time that he gets his own reality series on Bravo or Logo. Sorry, RuPaul, but you’ll just have to share the spotlight, darling.

Until the Michael Myers’ catwalking reality series is officially brought to fruition, however, we’ll simply have to sit back and settle for more videos of him strutting his stuff and dismembering his victims in a fashionably conscious and fierce way. Slay the house down, boots — or, should we say, Michael?

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