You’d think, after months of enduring the “man vs bear” conversation and learning just how little women trust men, the gents of the world would be a little more aware of themselves.
Some very likely are, in the wake of so much harsh feedback, but certainly not all. In fact, some men are doing the work to really establish “bear” as the better option, and making full-on assault their first task of the day.
TikToker Peyton Johnson was unfortunate enough to come across one such man on an early morning walk, and it might be enough to see her swear off men for good. A good 7AM walk shouldn’t be interrupted by anyone, let alone someone looking to disturb your peace, but that’s exactly what happened to the unfortunate TikToker when she was taking the dog she’s watching for a bright and early walk.
When a man walked by, a classic situation unfolded: He hit Johnson up with a few compliments — “oh you’re so beautiful,” “do you have a boyfriend,” — and, when she lied about her relationship status to end the conversation, this man gave audacity a new name. He kissed her. Kissed a stranger, uninvited, right on the mouth without consent. And then he simply walked away, no doubt riding high on his expeditious little assault.
What in the Weinstein? This man — who Johnson notes “wasn’t cute,” and was, in fact, drunk at 7AM — apparently has no comprehension of the concept of personal space, and now Johnson has to deal with the ick she gets every time she passes an innocent passerby on the sidewalk. Because who knows, maybe they, too, will simply toss decency aside for the rush of violating a complete stranger.
As commonly happens in the wake of these sort of incidents, people had plenty of feedback positing how Johnson should have responded. As we all know, there are four common responses to danger, and none of them are wrong. We all react differently when faced with unexpected situations, and judging others for their response — particularly when we can’t know how we’d respond in their position — is the farthest thing from helpful.
There are four typical stress responses that humans fall back on when presented with trouble, and its fair to say Johnson fits right in with her response to the stranger. Most humans will either fight, flee, freeze, or fawn when presented with a dangerous situation, and it sees Johnson inadvertently fell into the “freeze” camp with her response to that unwanted kiss. Sure, she could have fought the man — something plenty of commenters urged her to do — but how could she ensure her safety in that instance? Far better to walk away unscathed — if a bit grossed out — rather than spur on potential violence.
Thankfully, criticism wasn’t the only takeaway prevalent in the responses to Johnson’s video. Even as plenty of people were judging her for letting the man get close enough to steal a kiss, others were checking in on the TikToker and expressing their empathy over the situation.
Its easy to sit back and judge from behind a screen, but its also free to be kind. There are plenty who could use that reminder buried in the comment section of Johnson’s post, but thankfully she doesn’t seem to be affected much. She knows she reacted the best she could, and she walked away from the encounter safely, which — in this messed up world we live in — may be the best outcome we could hope for.