Emily Webb, a 36-year-old single woman, recently threw an outrageously fun “sperm shower” party to vet potential sperm donors for her journey to become a Single Mother By Choice (SMBC). Webb, an RN IBCLC (Internationally Board Certified Lactation Consultant), wanted to inject some much-needed joy into the often-stressful in-vitro fertilization (IVF) process. So she made a typically private and clinical decision into a public celebration with her closest friends.
Webb shared a viral clip of her unique baby daddy on TikTok, explaining her motivation: “There really isn’t anything fun about IVF so [I] decided to take the opportunity to enjoy this part.” She initially narrowed down her choices to 12 potential donors from various sperm banks across the country. Per the NY Times, the party was to go from 12 to 1.
The party was filled with “themed foods” and quirky decorations that embraced the “sperm shower” theme head-on. Webb also created a specialized slideshow presentation on Canva for each donor, complete with descriptions. Her friends and even virtual fans were completely captivated by the creative execution, with many praising the “10-out-of-10 theming.”
It’s also a great way to strengthen your community and chosen family
As the party progressed, Webb’s friends took their roles as “donor drafters” very seriously, meticulously filling out comment cards and scorecards as they looked at donor details. They delved into each donor’s health and family history, listened to voice recordings, and read personal letters.
Webb’s decision to pursue motherhood as a single woman places her among a rapidly growing community of Single Mothers By Choice. This rising trend sees more and more women opting for solo parenthood rather than waiting for “Mr. Right” to appear.
Per The Bump, data from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention indicates that a staggering 40% of all babies in the US are born to unmarried mothers. Even more strikingly, the number of single moms over age 30, like Webb, welcoming newborns has skyrocketed by 140% in the last three decades. While precise US figures for single women seeking fertility treatment with donor sperm are hard to come by, the UK saw a 62% increase between 2019 and 2022.
Webb’s journey highlights the dedication and effort many SMBCs undertake. She told People that the entire conception process has been “so stressful and not fun.” Living in a small town, she found her dating life wasn’t progressing, and her biological clock became a pressing concern. So, she decided to go for it alone since motherhood was that important to her. In fact, many SMBC’s cite bad partners and failed relationships as a reason to pursue this path too.
Going solo, however, has presented its own set of challenges. Webb had to endure stim injections for egg retrieval, followed by a demanding schedule of appointments. The lack of local labs providing same-day hormone results meant a lot of driving. For the egg retrieval procedure itself, she drove a grueling seven hours, ultimately freezing 15 eggs at age 35. She’s currently navigating “insurance limbo” before she can proceed with creating embryos.
Being an SMBC is empowering, partly because you get complete control of the parenting. However, this autonomy also means you’re solely responsible for everything, financially and emotionally. Everything from name choices that affect passports to routines falls on you, and has a bigger impact as a result. Many single parents report a “single-parent tax” on self-care activities, as things like doctor’s appointments or haircuts require additional childcare costs.
Despite these challenges, many single mothers by choice find immense gratitude and appreciation for their journey. Research actually supports the idea that children raised by single mothers by choice fare just as well as those in heterosexual couple households.
As for Webb, she and her crew narrowed down the candidates by prioritizing impeccable personal and family health history, education, blood type, and similar personalities. Her pick resonated with her thanks to a “really heartfelt and emotionally intelligent letter.” Webb plans to begin creating embryos in the coming months, hoping to have a healthy one for transfer and, ultimately, to become pregnant. She knows there are no guarantees, but she’s determined to try.
Published: Apr 6, 2026 06:00 am