Texas woman landed in the hospital because she didn’t want to use the bathroom at her new boyfriend’s house. When she got back, he had a song for her

Lana Saint Clair, a resident of San Antonio, recently shared how a common discomfort turned into a serious medical situation. In a viral video on TikTok, the Texan detailed how her reluctance to use the bathroom at her new boyfriend’s house for three weeks eventually landed her in the emergency room. The post, which has garnered over 6.2 million views, serves as a candid reminder that holding it in is never a good idea.

In the clip, Saint Clair is chatting with her boyfriend and shares the story through on-screen text. “This is Hayden. We’ve been dating for almost a year now. A few months into dating, I ended up in the ER because I didn’t want to poop at his house (for 3 weeks). When I came back over, he bear hugged me, carried me into the bathroom, sat me on the toilet and sang a song to my GI tract about why pooping is normal until I was comfortable. And that is my why.” 

If you are curious about his choice in song, Hayden actually popped into the comments section under the username Ginjiu to clear things up. He explained, “Hey everyone, it’s BF. It was the “Mr. doody” song from the movie Parental Guidance.” Saint Clair simply captioned her video, “I love my weird ginger man.”

This isn’t just a quirk, it’s a real condition

According to Refinery29, parcopresis or shy bowel syndrome involves a fear of using the bathroom in places that lack privacy or where others might be nearby. Professor Nick Haslam, author of Psychology In The Bathroom, notes that this is a psychological problem that falls under the umbrella of social anxiety disorders. It is a struggle that disproportionately affects women, often driven by a mix of social, psychological, and biological factors. 

Refinery29 points out that there is a clear gendered double standard regarding hygiene, where women are socialized to be more concerned about the cleanliness and purity of their bodies. While young men are sometimes given plaudits for passing wind, women are frequently taught to conceal their bodily functions at all costs.

The physical consequences of this shame are significant. Ignoring the call to stool can throw off the body’s natural diurnal rhythm and lead to serious constipation. Data from the Bowel Interest Group indicates that constipation led to 76,929 hospital admissions in England during the 2018-19 period, with women reportedly accounting for about 60 percent of those cases. 

Per the outlet, consultant gastroenterologist Dr. Lisa Das emphasizes that we must take this seriously. When you hold in stool, the bowel absorbs more fluid, making the waste harder and more painful to pass. This can create a vicious cycle where the act becomes so uncomfortable that individuals avoid it even longer. While it is not going to cause lifelong diseases like colon cancer, it can definitely cause bowel dysregulation and severe physical discomfort.

The women of TikTok shared that Lana wasn’t alone, even if it were mainly fart stories

Saint Clair’s comment section became a safe space for people to share their own humorous and relatable anecdotes about the first time they felt comfortable enough to let their guard down around a partner. One user shared, “The first time he slept over I farted in my sleep so loud I thought someone broke in, he didn’t have the heart to tell me and went to look for the source of the loud noise. He told me after we got married.” 

Other users appreciated the transparency of the post. One person noted, “ppl are saying this is oversharing but lowkey as someone terrified of using the bathroom at someone else’s house i’m so glad it isn’t just me.”

Per Refinery29, experts suggest that we need to challenge the gendered double standards that make these bodily functions feel like a source of shame. Then again, what do you do when you don’t have access to the bathroom, as a Louisiana woman faced in a trip to Alivin island, leading to a situation she had to flee from. Or even worse, what do you do if the toilet collapses around you, leaving you trapped in feces for 3 hours? 

Either way, it is good that people are more open to having these conversations. Life is hard enough without the added stress of trying to hide that you are a human being who needs to use the restroom.