We don’t often think about it on account of the endorphin hit we all get from package deliveries, but there are few chaotic hellscapes in this world quite as severe as the mailing one. Parcels go missing, items get damaged, drivers accidentally get wrapped up in a plot involving the Greek mafia and must face their inner demons if they ever hope to get this gnarly graphic tee to the right doorstep on time, it’s a whole thing.
The latter isn’t quite what happened to the protagonist of our little story down below, but let’s just say he’s nevertheless hit the jackpot if he’s part of a local FedEx office contest for Worst Day On The Job.
TikTok is the site of this series of unfortunate events, which begins with our protagonist finishing up a delivery, snapping a photo to prove that the package was delivered, only to be met by his own van that somehow snapped itself into reverse and began rolling straight towards the house, clobbering our hero in the process.
With no time to recover from the initial attack, all he can think to do is push against the vehicle with all his might so that it doesn’t crash into his customer’s house. The driver, unable to match the upper body strength of a Decepticon, fails in this endeavor, and the front of the house is soon counted amongst the van’s victims.
The owner of the house is, of course, not happy, as both her car and her house wound up getting dinged in this incident. After mirthlessly figuring out how they’re going to approach this from a legal standpoint, the man waits in the front yard while the lady goes back inside, presumably to fetch some non-specified materials and information. It’s at this moment that the truck decides it hasn’t filled its mischief quota just yet, and wheels off in the opposite direction in search of another car to dent. Despite the driver’s best efforts, it succeeds in its malicious campaign yet again.
Now, this is a pretty ridiculous farce no matter how you swing it, but it’s an especially embarrassing bind to be in considering how relatively rare vehicular accidents are for FedEx drivers. According to Skaug Law, FedEx drivers were involved in 405 accidents between December 2019 and December 2021. That number obviously isn’t ideal, but considering the sheer number of miles that are traveled by FedEx’s tens of thousands of drivers every year, it could also be far worse.
But at the end of the day, this truck’s mayhem didn’t seem to result in anyone getting hurt, and so this will hopefully enter the driver’s hilarious memory ranks sooner rather than later, because if you look at the nuts and bolts of what went down, how can you not laugh at some point?