It’s kind of impressive how, no matter what you do, someone out there will have something to say about it. We all have thoughts and opinions, sure, but some are best kept to ourselves.
Commenting on other people’s lives appears to be an uncontrollable urge for a lot of folks, though, and no one knows it better than user @ellazahra_ on TikTok. On July 29, the 21-year-old uploaded a video to the platform, sharing how an old lady felt the need to make a snide remark about her outfit after she boarded the train. In the clip, we can hear the other passenger accusing Ella of putting herself at risk for sexual violence by walking around with “very little clothes on,” and claiming that young women don’t take care of themselves because they don’t cover up enough. Unwilling to let something like this go unaddressed, the young woman respectfully pushed back on the remarks, however, it all fell on deaf ears.
In the TikTok’s description, Ella talked about how this lady’s comments affected her, briefly making her question the way she was dressed. As we can see in the video, she was actually wearing a stylish yet very normal outfit — a mini skirt paired with a long-sleeved cropped blouse — but that’s beside the point. Regardless of her clothes, no one has the right to comment on a person’s appearance, let alone blame them for the crimes that someone else might commit. Ella also used the video’s description to express her shock toward this mindset, ending her message with a piece of advice for other women: “WEAR WHATEVER YOU WANT.”
The short clip quickly went viral, and has been mostly received with shock by TikToker users. “It’s unbelievable that a woman would say something like that,” one person chimed in, as another praised Ella’s patience: “You handled that very respectfully when she didn’t deserve it. Good job!” On the other hand, some folks clearly learned nothing from the original post and decided to take the old lady’s side by making comments such as: “You’re asking to get graped dressing like that.”
Ella made it a point to address this last person in a follow-up video, using their comment as an example of the negative words that have been directed at her lately. The TikToker showcased her frustration and anger toward people who victim blame, and left a warning to other women: “Stay safe (…) there are some sick people out there.”
Unfortunately, victim blaming is still a very prevalent issue, with 40% of Americans believing that victims of sexual violence are sometimes responsible for the crimes, per Gitnux Market Data. Despite such a widespread perception, according to a report from The Washington Post, studies actually indicate that only about 4.4% of sexual assault cases involve “provocative behavior” from the victim, and women who dress modestly are at higher risk of being targets, as this seemingly indicates a more passive personality.
This goes to show creeps will be creeps no matter what, so just wear what you feel comfortable in and have fun with it, ladies.