Angry people are an unfortunate reality of this life, but there are workarounds to take the steam straight out of your next outraged Kyle encounter.
There’s one overarching name for an irate white woman — also known as a Karen — but there’s no agreed-upon name for the angry dude. We call them Kyles, Kevins, Chads, and Darrens, but regardless of the name, they’re a disappointing reality of being in public. Thankfully, TikTok user Ravine (@shescutesy) has a solution, and it will massively improve your next encounter with a rage-filled Ryan or entitled Karen.
Far too many miserable people seem to get their kicks out of yelling at strangers while driving, waiting in line, or out on the town, but Ravine has a stellar solution to dealing with all that misplaced rage. It won’t stop Furious Frank from screaming, but it will change your mindset around his rage entirely.
See, Ravine notes, in a thoroughly brief TikTok, that “dog’s buttholes clench in and out when they’re barking,” a strange trend that anyone with a dog has likely noticed at least once. My bestie’s dog, aptly named Sevro, is notorious for engaging in the practice with his behind on full display, and I can say with massive discomfort that Ravine’s assertion is 100% true.
It’s what she says next that will change your next argument, however. Ravine goes on to explain that “the same thing happens to humans when they’re yelling.” So next time someone decides to unleash their poorly-regulated emotions on you, remember that they’re pulling a Sevro beneath all those layers.
Ravine’s claim isn’t 100% accurate, but it does share plenty of territory with the truth. While humans don’t necessarily enjoy the same flexation of the anus that dog’s do, every sphincter in our body responds to certain stimuli. And anger — in particular shouting — is absolutely something that would trigger your butthole to clench and unclench in rapid succession.
The research I did to learn all of this is hilariously cursed, and also led me to stumble across a phrase known as the “anal wink,” and if I had to learn about it, so do you. This likely isn’t what Ravine is referencing with her angry butthole claims, but it is an interesting development in our anatomy. An anal wink occurs when stimuli — either tactile or noxious — triggers the anal passage to contract. It’s actually very important, and a sign of good health, and if your body doesn’t react with a wink when stimulated, it could point to damage to the spinal cord or an interruption of the relex arch.
So… there’s that. You’re welcome, dear reader, for that strange and unasked-for knowledge. You’re also welcome for the advice when it comes to your next angry encounter, which should make it a lot easier to handle all that rage. When you know what’s going on beneath the surface, Ravine is exactly right: “You’ll never take anyone seriously again.”