Countering Fiona’s plan, Delia goes to visit the Axeman and reveal how he’s been used by Fiona since the start. This puts a wrench in Fiona’s plan when the Axeman murders her before going to the Coven to kill the rest of them. Fiona’s death was a bit of a shocker, but having it revealed in a flashback was just stupid. In fact, having her die was stupid. As we’ve seen in the past three months, nobody could stay dead if they wanted to. The chances of Fiona returning for the finale are astronomical, and I will eat a pair of socks if she doesn’t somehow rise from the grave.
We’re supposed to believe that this episode takes place a few days after the last, which means that LaLaurie is now a tour guide in her old house, dispelling any rumors about her killing spree. Queenie catches her and gives her a chance to repent and work with some civil organization instead of killing her, but nope, all of LaLaurie’s character growth is squandered in a pointlessly modern scene that, in my opinion, makes it hard to care about anything LaLaurie contributed this season. She attributes any softness she showed to the fact that everybody is so PC and ready to apologize for even the smallest mistake.
While I suppose this resilience fits into her character, I honestly felt cheated. It was nice to see LaLaurie and Laveau rot in Papa Legba’s version of hell in the end, but I’m still not clear on how they got there. If Laveau “dies,” then LaLaurie can die as well? Except, both are immortal, so how do they die? Who knows, let’s just acknowledge that this plotline is tied off and move on.
But first, let me drool over Legba for a second: Papa Legba is easily the best character of the season, and it’s a shame they only introduced him a few weeks ago. Make next season all about Papa Legba stealing babies and I’m sold.
Delia uses her powers to find Misty, bringing her back into the fray as well. But what bothers me more than that convenient plot point is the make up used on Delia’s eyes. I’ll just say it: it’s disgusting. And luckily, much of the episode is focused close up on her face, which she chooses to leave wide open and uncovered. I was glad to feel sickened by the show again since it’s been so long, but by the end of that hour I was ready to just stop watching. Why are the remains of her eyes swollen beyond her eyelids? I don’t know much about anatomy or physiology, but that seems a tad bit goofy.
When the Axeman arrives at the mansion to kill the Coven, they all use their now extraordinary powers to slice him into bits and take him out of the story. The episode ends appropriately with all of the surviving witches being told that they will soon perform the Seven Wonders as a group and settle the issue once and for all.
I felt that Coven really started on a strong note, and the first half of the season was entirely enjoyable. Sure, it had zombies and minotaurs, but at least it was fun. Now it’s transformed into a soap opera following a catty group of witches trying to prove which one of them is the best. Forgive me if I find that infinitely less interesting than battling freaking zombies in your front yard.
This final rush to close off the plot is leaving way too many holes unfilled, and it’s getting to the point where it’s hard to ignore them and just say that the rest of the season makes up for it. American Horror Story: Coven has been a lot of things this season, but these final episodes have been nothing but plodding, aimless and rushed yet again. Thank God that season finale is finally here.
