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Ringer Season 1-14 ‘Whores Don’t Make That Much’ Recap

Siobhan (Sarah Michelle Gellar) is one step ahead of the game. She empties her secret office and leaves Bridget (also Gellar) and Malcolm (Mike Colter) scratching their heads. It doesn't take long before Bridget starts to connect the missing key with the change of decor. Malcolm starts to get technologically savvy and puts Bridget on GPS. At least he'll know where to find her when she runs into trouble.
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Everything might be coming to a head and secrets the twins have both been trying to hide might come out in this episode of Ringer.

Siobhan (Sarah Michelle Gellar) is one step ahead of the game. She empties her secret office and leaves Bridget (also Gellar) and Malcolm (Mike Colter) scratching their heads. It doesn’t take long before Bridget starts to connect the missing key with the change of decor. Malcolm starts to get technologically savvy and puts Bridget on GPS. At least he’ll know where to find her when she runs into trouble.

In a surprise twist of maternal instincts, Catherine (Andrea Roth) approaches Andrew (Ioan Gruffudd) about Juliet relocating to Miami. For someone without a motherly bone in her body, it seems like more than a shock to her ex. I wonder what Juliet will think about this new offer on the table? It’s probably not what she had in mind when she plead for a fresh start. Catherine seems genuine with this new suggestion – her reasoning even makes sense. Sober looks good on her.

Juliet (Zoey Deutch) isn’t the only one surprised by Tessa’s new ride. She hasn’t wasted any time spending her part of the settlement and as every con artist should know, the best way to get away with the crime it is to be discrete – someone should have shared this with the new girl. The truce between the ‘frenemies’ was short lived, as it seems that someone still has a chip on her shoulder and that chip might be the thing that brings this house of cards down.

Now that Henry (Kris Polaha) understands the financial risks that being part of Martin/Charles presents, he heads straight for a confused Andrew to cash out. Andrew is taken off-guard but recovers quickly and agrees to the withdrawal. I wonder what was going through Malcolm’s head while he eavesdropped on this conversation?

Bridget gets an interesting call from a florist. Apparently the address she found on Siobhan’s desk belongs to a women who she sends flowers to once a year; something she’s done for the last half decade. Bridget tries her luck knocking at this mystery door, and what does she get? Someone who is actually happy to see see her. Well, not her, but Siobhan. The connection is sitting on the mantle: pictures of Siobhan’s dead son, Sean – this woman is his grandmother.

A flashback! Seven years ago, Siobhan was unhappily-ever-after dealing with her ex and supporting Bridget as single mother. This must have been before things hit rock bottom and everyone was left picking up their pieces.

Mr. C (Jason Dohring) comes out in some street camo to meet up with Juliet – on the street – because that’s a well-thought out plan. Hiding in plain sight perhaps? Juliet spills Tessa’s recent idiotic moves and Mr. C responds with “I’ll take care of it.” I’m no expert on reading between the lines, but his tone doesn’t sound like he’s going to exactly ask her nicely to tone it down over ice cream sundaes. By the way, if this was an episode of Gossip Girl, they so would have been spotted!

Everything we’ve seen up until now made it seem like Bridget is responsible for Sean’s death – but now the picture looks a little less fuzzy. What does his father, Dylan, have to do with this unhappy memory?

Things just took a turn for the worst – it’s beginning to look a little like an old-school Alanis Morisette song. In an “ironic” development, Juliet arrives at school to news of Tessa fighting for her life at a nearby hospital after being robbed and beaten. But Juliet’s not the only one in for a surprise this morning. Bridget has a guest – Siobhan’s ex, Dylan – and he has flowers!

Wow! This is the first time we’ve seen Bridget get super emotional about anything and let it out. It must have felt good to speak her mind after what has probably been about seven years. That outburst would have delighted Siobhan I imagine.

At the hospital, Juliet meets Tessa’s foster mom and gets some of the nauseous details. The “robber” went straight for the money under the bed. Fancy that.

After Bridget has a nightmare about the accident, she heads to Dylan’s happy home poised to take out a window with a brick. Malcolm shows up at the right time – looks like the GPS app has already paid off – and wants some answers. The retelling of events comes in the form of an emotional flashback. Siobhan turned coldhearted with the tragedy and Bridget spiraled out of control. This leads us back to the present. Siobhan has never forgiven Bridget for her role in the accident, and Bridget has never forgiven herself.

Juliet is dealing with her own guilt over the current predicament and jumps at the chance to flea to Miami. Too bad Bridget can’t come clean and let her in on a well-known secret. Your past always catches up with you.

Mr. C comes out hiding long enough to play dumb about the Tessa incident, which leads Juliet to make a phone call that raises eyebrows. My gut is telling me that Juliet isn’t the mastermind behind this grand plan. My guess: mommy dearest is pulling the strings. Just putting that out there in the universe. Let’s see what happens.

On Siobhan’s suggestion (orders?), Henry makes a play to get close to Malcolm. Everyone’s got an agenda! Too bad Henry isn’t as slick as his femme fatale lover. He pulls out the key ring that mysteriously disappeared from the penthouse and leaves himself open to a new agenda.

Yes! My gut was right on. Catherine has been behind this from the beginning, and we’re back to the “not having a motherly bone in her body.” Isn’t it odd that both Andrew’s ex and Siobhan, his wife that faked her own death to get away from him, both are so determined to take him for all he’s worth. He seems like such a nice guy…

Errgh! It’s killing me knowing that Siobhan is still alive and Bridget can’t stop punishing herself for something that wasn’t even her fault! And don’t even get me started on Juliet. Her innocent act must be about to reach its expiration date.

What drama do you want to see on the next episode of Ringer?


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Lindsay Sperling
Lindsay Sperling has A.D.D. and her tastes reflect it. Her movie collection boasts everything from Casablanca to John Tucker Must Die to every season of Sons of Anarchy to-date. She adamantly supported a Veronica Mars Movie (yes, she did make a donation to see it happen..and also possibly for the t-shirt), hopes that the Fast & Furious franchise continues far into the future, and has read every popular YA book series turned film in recent years (except Harry Potter..). When she's not on an indie film set or educating the youth of America, she uses her time arguably productive as a freelance writer.