Woman goes on a Hinge date with a ‘Christian conservative.’ 25 minutes in, he demands her body count: ‘How many? How many question’

A video of a man asking a woman about her sexual history on a first date has gone viral on TikTok, sparking debate in the comments section. The clip was posted by the account Not Joe (@notjoebonham) and has since gained 1.9 million views. In the video, the man can be seen sitting across a table from his date, who is filming the encounter.

The on-screen text reads, “FIRST DATE he tries to ask my body count 😩,” giving viewers context before the conversation begins. The man, who has light brown curly hair and a beard and is wearing a grey collared shirt, opens by saying, “Let me just be direct here.” He then asks, “How many people have you been with?”

The caption read: “His Hinge bio said “Christian Conservative” NEVER again #hinge #firstdate #relatable #datingadvice #xyzbca” The woman, who remains off-screen throughout the video, asks him to clarify what he means, “Been with? Like dated?”, to which the man responds, “Intimately.” She then tells him she has had “probably” three serious boyfriends, but the man immediately follows up by asking, “In how long?”

The viral exchange that divided viewers over dating norms and timing

At that point, the woman asks directly, “Um, are you asking how many people I’ve slept with?” The man confirms: “I’ll just be direct. Yeah, how many, how many people have you done that with?”

The woman pushes back, telling him, “That’s a crazy question for, we’re 25 minutes into a first date.” She says she would have no issue answering the question under different circumstances, explaining, “I have no issue answering the question if we were, I don’t know, seeing each other a few months and it was kind of relevant, but right now it doesn’t seem relevant to who knows what if we even see each other again.”

The man then appears to suggest she is being evasive, saying, “Oh, so that’s something that you want me to find out like later down the road once I start, you know, once I can’t, you know, once we’re together and then you just, then you’ll be honest with me is what you’re saying.”

The woman firmly responds: “I’m being honest with you now that I don’t think it’s an appropriate question. I’m not going to answer that.” Similar inappropriate questions have led to confrontations on other first dates, like a man trying to mansplain a woman’s incurable disease.

The video appears to have resonated with a wide audience, drawing a range of reactions in the comments. Several viewers sided with the woman, with one writing, “That’s not a first date question,” and another saying, “Married 10 years, never had this conversation!” One commenter also wrote, “This is exactly why I’m single and will stay single.”

However, not all viewers were critical of the man’s approach. One comment read, “He just wants to know what he’s getting. I don’t see anything wrong with him asking.” Another viewer offered a more mixed take, writing, “He has a point but is going about it wrong and at the wrong time.”

The video was filmed from the woman’s perspective, with a red cup visible in the foreground. The man is shown leaning slightly forward during the exchange. It is not clear from the video whether the two continued the date after the conversation shown in the clip. Similar dating encounters can involve surprising family dynamics, like a mother’s opinion on a match.