‘Kek you frens later’: Is Elon Musk really pathetic enough to anonymously praise himself on 4Chan?

We all know Elon Musk is the neediest man to ever walk the face of the Earth, but does he really crave praise so badly he’ll seek it out on 4Chan?! Though Musk’s brain was gradually deteriorating throughout the 2010s, his 2022 purchase of Twitter hyper-accelerated the process.

Cut to the present and the once-respected billionaire is now renaming himself “Kekius Maximus,” is about to co-run a sham government commission named after a meme dog, and has wholeheartedly embraced far-right politics. Along the way, he’s also proven that even the richest man in the world can’t buy charisma.

But even knowing everything we do about this sad creature, even we struggle to believe he’s anonymously bigging himself up to the lonely 15-year-old boys of 4Chan. The story begins with the apparent revelation that Elon’s X burner account is named “Adrian Dittman,” which is its own rabbit hole of inanity. Anyway, as part of “ELON MELTDOWN GENERAL #7” (archived here) on 4Chan users began discussing (and, naturally, insulting) Elon en masse.

And which gallant knight strides in to protect Elon’s honor? None other than “Adrian Dittman,” who appears to have a curiously thorough insight into Elon’s life. Responding to criticism he said: “Elon has done more in his 20s than you will ever do in your entire pathetic life,” reassuring users that “Elon is a fren, do not forget that,” and going out of his way to underline that “Elon is a father who gets lots of sex.” Urgh. Ew. *Barf*.

The apparent cherry on top was a screenshot posted by “Dittman” that seems to show that whoever he is has full admin privileges on X:

The internet being what it is, it seems entirely possible that this is an elaborate hoax either by someone trying to discredit Musk or expose Musk’s critics as overly credulous. On the other hand, everything we know about Musk’s personality, intelligence, and craving for validation from the cool kids online makes this dizzyingly plausible. I mean, a 53-year-old man posting on 4Chan is the precise kind of charmless loser who’d chortle at rebranding himself as “Kekius Maximus.”

As amusing as Musk’s auto-humiliation exercise is, the sobering truth is that this damaged weirdo is about to get a huge amount of domestic political power. He’s already supporting far-right parties in Germany (huh, wonder how that usually goes) and demanding the release of hate figure Tommy Robinson in the United Kingdom. From Jan. 20 Musk will have his thumb firmly on President Donald Trump, who now owes him bigly for the financial support during his 2024 election.

Perhaps our only hope is that the famous catty Trump doesn’t appreciate playing second fiddle to Musk and the two have an almighty falling out. And when your slim hopes for the future rest on Trump’s almighty ego to save the day, you can’t help but conclude we’ve slipped into a truly cursed timeline.

Maybe one day we will find out for certain whether “Adrian Dittman” and Elon Musk are the same person, but in the meantime at least the denizens of 4Chan are canny enough to dub him “a nepobaby who could not have accomplished anything in his life” and many, many, other insanely offensive things that cannot be repeated.