What it would be like to go on date with each Avenger?

Image via Marvel Studios

Superheroes are regular humans, but better. They have abilities we don’t have, usually can traverse long distances in short periods (so they’re probably on time a lot), and they are generally better looking than your average Joe.

Put all these things together and what do you have? Relationship goals! As Mary Jane has shown us in the Spider-Man universe, a loving relationship between a superhero and a regular person is completely possible – well besides the constant possibility of death for either party.

How about The Avengers? What would it be like to date each of them? You’re about to find out, but before we get into that let’s get into some history.

Who are The Avengers?

The Avengers is one of those groups that has a revolving door of members, so we’re going to focus on the Avengers in the latest Marvel movies.

The team includes Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, Spider-Man, Hulk, Black Widow, Vision, Hawkeye, Wanda Maximoff and Ant-Man.

Now let’s look into how they got started.

What’s the origin of The Avengers?

The Avengers started with Nick Shield, director of S.H.I.E.L.D. His first recruit was Tony Stark, who caught his eye after his defeat of Obadiah Stane and the public reveal that he was Iron Man. In addition to Stark, Fury had his eye on various members of the rest of the team.

When Asgardian god Loki arrived on earth and stole the Tesseract, S.H.I.E.LD. activated The Avengers. Their first battle as a unit was against Loki and the invading Chitauri forces. OK on to the fun stuff!

What would a date with Iron Man be like?

Marvel Studios

Stark is incredibly wealthy, very handsome and loves to drink. He’s incredibly smart and very in shape. He’s 6’1” and weighs about 225 lbs. outside of his armor and 425 lbs. inside of it.

His eyes are blue and his hair is black. He has a knack for working with machines and created an implant in his chest that keeps a piece of shrapnel from stopping his heart. That power helped Stark to create his first Iron Man suit.

A date with Tony Stark could happen anywhere in the world, but because he’s so great with machines Stark would take you back to his compound and let his various machines prepare and cook an enormous meal while sipping cocktails (or mocktails depending on whether he’s currently drinking or not).

You’d be waited on hand and foot by various electronic assistants. He’s also a romantic, so he’d take you out for a moonlight flight after dinner to look at the stars and the moon, where he’d regale you with stories of his adventures as an Avenger and superhero.

Stark, while self-centred, is also highly emotional intelligent so he would make sure your needs are met and that you’re having the night of your life. Play your cards right and you could end up in an Iron Man suit of your own, flying alongside Stark as you jet through the atmosphere.

What would a date with Wanda Maximoff be like?

WandaVision

Thanks to the hit show Wandavision, we have a pretty good sense of what it would be like to be in a relationship with the Scarlet With herself. Originally a villain, the super-powerful Maximoff eventually fell in love with fellow Avenger Vision and switched sides.

While she has a number of powers like telekinesis and energy manipulation, she also can read thoughts to find out exactly what scares someone the most. This means that if Maximoff is interested in you, she could do a mental read and pretty much create the perfect date for you from the ground up.

In the same way that she hijacked a whole town to keep Vision occupied in the show, she could create a romantic evening with all of your favorite meals somewhere that made you feel really comfortable.

Of course, that could also feel like work for her and she might just want to relax and eat a cheeseburger and see a movie instead of concocting a whole scenario using her superpowers. Because she’s so caring to people she loves, there’s always the chance that she would want you to take charge and you could always take her to a restaurant that serves food from her country of origin: Sokovia.

What would a date with Ant-Man be like?

Avengers: Endgame

Ant-Man used to be a criminal, and a pretty good one at that. He was a thief and an electronics expert. In addition to the Avengers he’s been a member of the Fantastic Four and the Guardians of the Galaxy.

Ant-Man’s real name is Scott Lang, and he’s a pretty laid back person. He can shrink to a tiny size but he maintains his normal superhuman strength. He can also communicate with ants.

At one point, Lang dated fellow Marvel jewel thief Jessica Jones. That unfortunately ended when she informed him she was pregnant with Luke Cage’s baby.

When he’s not becoming the size of an atom, Lang is a simple man. A date with Ant-Man would be a relaxed picnic in a park. Since he can talk to the ants, they won’t bother you and instead could do things like carry your drink to you or move the cookies closer.

He’s a devoted father and he’s not arrogant so he’ll spend a lot of time getting to know you personally, asking questions and thinking about your needs. He’s smart and a great conversationalist honestly he’s a sleeper pick for best Avenger to date.

What would it be like to go on a date with The Hulk?

she-hulk hulk
via Marvel Studios

Bruce Banner, the Hulk’s human counterpart, is actually fairly mild-mannered and thoughtful. He thinks things through, searches for solutions to problems and is a good listener. Even Hulk, who loves to smash stuff and create chaos, is fairly sensitive and emotional.

Banner would take you to a museum – either natural history or art, and you could peruse installations and he would provide anecdotes about things. He enjoys the finer things in life too, but like Ant-Man, he’s not pretentious. He’s just as comfortable in a fancy restaurant as he is with a hot dog vendor on the corner.

Keep things calm with him though, you wouldn’t like him when he’s angry.

What would a date with Hawkeye be like?

Hawkeye

Hawkeye is the least “super” of all the superheroes, meaning that he doesn’t actually have superhuman powers (besides handsomeness is that one?) He’s also not going to take you on some archery date because that’s what he does for work so that’s pretty boring to him.

We all know Hawkeye loves jumping off buildings and doesn’t like heights, so he’ll take you to a high rooftop bar with a beautiful view of the city. He’s a family man, so in this scenario obviously he’s not married but you’re definitely going out for ice cream afterwards.

He’s also a very moral man, so if you’re still around the next day he’s going to maybe ask you to go to a farmer’s market for some organic plums. With Hawkeye, you’re getting a loyal, serious man with a strong moral compass and a fearlessness that’ll definitely be exciting.

What would a date with Thor be like?

Chris Hemsworth Thor: Love and Thunder
Image via Marvel Studios

Thor is a god, so this would probably be the best date of all time. Not only is everything in our world available, everything from the mystical world of Asgard is on the docket as well. Ambrosia is going to definitely be on the menu, along with cakes and decadent treats as an appetizer and probably one of the best meals you’ve ever had.

As a royal, Thor will treat you with kindness, understanding and a little bit of irreverence for normal customs. He’s definitely not used to saying no to things, and he’s definitely going to want to have a late nightcap on the summit of a mountain or volcano. He’s handsome and smart and a God? What a catch!

What would a date with Black Widow be like?

Black Widow, like Hawkeye, doesn’t technically have superpowers but she’s incredibly adept at what she does. She probably has a pretty big wall up, so you’d have to do a lot of the talking and also be patient when it comes to her emotional availability. After all, she was raised in a spy training program so that doesn’t lend itself to loving feelings out of the gate.

She’s also incredibly loyal, however, and if she agreed to go on a date with you that means there’s always a chance for something more. She is a master of a number of martial arts, but on a date, she’s going to want to do something a little quieter.

Start the night with some dinner and drinks and a nice steakhouse and then you’ll go to a quiet bar where after a few drinks she’ll want to sing some karaoke. Play your cards right and the night could go on but remember it’s all about her. And, she doesn’t need you or anyone else so you have to impress her. Oh, and don’t make her mad either. You wouldn’t like her when she’s mad.

What would it be like to date Captain America?

The captain was frozen in ice for a long time, and he’s still getting used to the modern world. A nice time at a carnival will help him feel right at home. As a bonus, his superpowers mean he can win all the prizes and you can finally own one of those huge teddy bears and realize it’s too big and then throw it out.

With Captain America, just be nice and he’ll be nice too. It doesn’t take a lot – a good old fashioned chocolate milkshake and a stop on the local makeout point at the top of the hill overlooking the town is perfect for him and will make him very comfortable.

Captain America is probably the most ideal-forward Avenger so he’s loyal and compassionate and willing to put in the work for a relationship he believes in.