‘That Dasher DASHED’: Police lock down neighborhood but determined DoorDasher won’t be stopped from delivering his order

Today’s TikTok story is straight out of an episode of The Simpsons. A microcosm of American culture that could not have been more insightful if it had been written by Matt Groening himself.

The person who captured the moment, TikTok user valerie_missvalbelle, is as much a curious character as the video’s two other protagonists. Valerie decided to open the door of the house she was looking after while her friend was out of town after hearing police sirens and an officer’s voice booming through a speaker, asking an unidentified suspect who was under arrest to come out with their hands up, and informing them and the neighborhood residents that there was a K-9 searching the area.

Valerie finally went inside but forgot to turn the deadlock and instead rushed to the window to get more of the action. Nevermind the threat of a possible shootout and the repeated, extremely concerning police warnings to “get inside and lock the doors.” Still, we will grant her one thing, she was risking her safety to give us all a hilarious and cinematic piece of internet gold.

“You should get a raise for cracking that window so we can hear it along with seeing the entertainment,” one commentator praised, to which Valerie, who had previously been replying to several comments asking her why she wasn’t more concerned, replied “THIS comment. thank you.” Human curiosity and our need to be entertained will always speak louder than logic, we fear.

Yet, the best part of the video was still to come when a delivery person for DoorDash relaxedly rolled in on their grey pickup truck, seemingly unbothered by the police car and its flashing emergency lights. The truck then stopped just a few short yards ahead, because this DoorDasher just simply had to make his delivery. And the police just… let him.

To be fair, the officer repeatedly and aggressively told the DoorDash man to “HURRY UP!,” which, in turn, gave us the funniest moment of this uncanny clip: the sprint that the poor employee did to deliver the package. We hope this person is getting paid enough for this. “That dasher DASHED!!,” said one viewer.

As another pointed out, “DoorDash should use this for a commercial, it is gold,” but judging by the fact that the company took no time interacting with the video, we’re sure they’re at least considering that strategy. “Too stunned to speak,” DoorDash commented.

Valerie promised her eager followers that she would post a second video explaining why she didn’t lock her door. We’re hoping to hear more about the alleged criminal that caused all this comotion.

Look, the video is amusing and apparently harmless, so there’s no point bringing the mood down with statistics about gun deaths in the U.S. We figure both the TikToker and the DoorDasher’s breezy reactions to the whole predicament say more than a thousand words or an episode of The Simpsons could.