Dimwitted Devin Nunes, ‘a man who lost a lawsuit to a cow,’ appointed to lead the Intelligence Advisory Board

There is a simple formula for nabbing a seat on Donald Trump‘s cabinet. The easiest shoe-in is a blood tie, unless your name is Tiffany, of course. Another requires that his appointees have oodles of cash — if there is one thing Trump loves as much as his kids, it’s the wealthy. He’s built much of his cabinet around the fabulously rich he rubs elbows with in his Mar-a-Lago resort, but there is one other way to catch his attention.

Blind loyalty is the only way to go if your bank account ends with less than six zeros. If there is anything Donald Trump loves more than money, it’s stogies to stroke his ego, and there are few as dedicated as Devin Nunes. The GOP Representative showcased his loyalty repeatedly while in office, and he continues to lavish love on Trump as the head of his failing social media site, Truth Social. Nunes’s loyalty is about to pay off yet again, this time as a private citizen in a governmental role.

Trump announced on Saturday that Nunes would be one of 16 private citizens hand-selected by the president-elect to monitor “the effectiveness with which the [intelligence community] is meeting the nation’s intelligence needs,” according to Whitehouse.gov. Don’t let the wording fool you — while the office has been working with presidents for more than five decades, these are no “average Americans” Trump is handpicking. Nunes may have been a lawmaker once, but these days he’s closer to Trump than half of the man’s children. He’s the CEO of Trump’s social media company, Truth Social, and makes nearly a million bucks a year working for the company — a company that Trump still owns nearly 60 percent of, and one he has no intention of selling.

First elected in 2003, Nunes was a seasoned politician by the time Trump rolled into the White House, and served during both the Bush and Obama administrations. He was selected as a permanent select committee chair in 2015 and finally caught Trump’s attention in 2018 after flagging an alleged conspiracy against the Trump campaign.

Nunes released a memo detailing the FBI’s apparent shadowing of Trump aide Carter Page. Though Democrats called the memo “deliberately misleading,” it kicked off the investigations into the Steele Dossier, a DNC-backed investigation into Trump’s ties to Russia, and cemented Nunes as one of Trump’s staunchest allies. It eventually led to his appointment as CEO of a social media company, which definitely counts as one of the more ironic twists of fate.

You see, back in 2019, Nunes got into a row with a Twitter account poking fun at him. While we hope our representatives don’t have time to waste on Twitter trolls, Nunes attempted to subpoena the real name of the user behind the accounts @DevnCow and @DevinNunesmom, but the request was swiftly shut down. Mocking politicians is a right as old as this country, and it actively falls under the right to free speech. Unsurprisingly, the court disagreed with Nunes when he tried to claim that phrases like his “boots are full of manure” were in no way satirical. He also attempted to sue the Fresno Bee and compared homeless people to a “zombie apocalypse.”

We don’t know for certain how much Nunes’s new title offers, but based on salary averages, it’s safe to assume his yearly take-home is over a million — especially if Trump’s intended taxes, which overwhelmingly benefit the wealthy, come to pass. Even more concerning is that a man who is so loyal to Trump and so ingrained in his posse is now serving on what is supposed to stand as an unbiased advisory board that has unfettered access to the intelligence community.

It’s just more proof that all Trump cares about is finding the appropriate goon to push through his agenda, no matter the cost to the rest of us.