The assembly process for Donald Trump’s second cabinet has been about as rocky as that one boxing movie starring Sylvester Stallone, and it’s been dealt yet another blow courtesy of Pete Hegseth.
As a refresher (though I’m sure you’d prefer to forget), Trump put Hegseth forward as his pick for the Secretary of Defence position last month. However, Hegseth’s nomination is currently hanging in the balance amid allegations of sexual assault, excessive drinking, and a scathing email sent to him by his mother circa 2018, all of which threaten his Senate confirmation for the high-ranking federal role.
With all that chaos, it has now been reported that Trump is eyeing other candidates for the Secretary of Defence role if Hegseth’s nomination falls through. Proving that when one terrible door closes, an equally terrible one opens, the name reportedly on Trump’s McDonald’s-stained lips is none other than Ron DeSantis (pause for collective shudder). According to NBC News, who heard from two inside sources, the president-elect is considering replacing the embattled Hegseth with the Florida governor.
“[DeSantis is] very much in contention,” one source claimed, with another saying Trump even spoke directly to the governor ahead of the Senate confirmation. “Trump talked to the governor and wants him to do it,” they said. Given DeSantis’ record, which includes a failed presidential campaign, a yearlong legal dispute with Disney, and the curtailing LGTBQ rights, it’s hardly promising news, even if he was one of the few people to go toe-to-toe with Trump on the campaign trail. Neither DeSantis or Trump have responded to the reports of the former’s potential nomination.
Despite all the chatter, Hegseth remains steadfast in his belief that Trump remains fully supportive of him, saying this week that he’s “not going anywhere” despite the avalanche of negative press. “I spoke to the president this morning,” Hegseth said, no doubt giddy that the object of his sycophancy even has his phone number, “and he supports me fully.” Should his nomination turn to dust, it will mark the second time a Trump-selected candidate for his cabinet has failed, following Matt Gaetz’s withdrawal as Attorney General amid a House Ethics Committee investigation into accusations of sexual misconduct.
If DeSantis assumes the role, the governor will join a who’s who of Trump loyalists as part of his second administration. So far, we’ve got billionaire and would-be “first-buddy” Elon Musk as the co-lead of a government efficiency program, former WWE performer Linda McMahon for Secretary of Education, and TV personality Dr. Oz as the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services administrator.
Meanwhile, RFK Jr. — who detests vaccines and fluoride almost as much as he detests leaving roadkill where it’s supposed to be — is up for Health Secretary, and Kristi Noem, the fear of dogs across the country, is the nominee for Secretary of Defence.
I’d say we’re in good hands, but that’s not really the case when some of those hands allegedly decapitated a whale, buried a bear cub in Central Park, fake-punched performers in a WWE wrestling ring, and shot a misbehaved dog on a family farm. I’d offer my final thoughts on Hegseth, but his mother already did that for me in a 2018 email that’s so scathingly poetic it should be hung in the Louvre.