Troubled Trump needs bond money, campaign cash, and a hug as NY AG prepares to decimate life as he knows it

Who knows what’s going to happen this November, or to Trump’s business and political careers long-term, so for the moment, let’s just bask in his current calamitous state of affairs: Donald Trump may be on the brink of having his assets seized after failing to pay his $464 million bail bond.

New York Attorney General Letitia James has officially made the first move towards seizing a number of the former president’s properties, assuming that he does indeed fail to drum up the near half-billion dollars in cash required by Monday, March 25. Following on from Trump’s lawyers admitting it would be “impossible” for him to get together that kind of money on March 18, state officials have now entered the judgement from Trump’s costly civil fraud trial with the Westchester county clerk’s office, thereby setting Judge Arthur Engoron’s ruling in stone.

Now, Trump’s attorneys have filed an appeal with the appeals court that could see Trump be allowed to forego paying his bail. If the appeals court doesn’t step in, however, then James could well start the legal process of hoovering up both Trump’s bank accounts and his physical assets in the Manhattan and Westchester areas by Monday. The properties up for grabs are Trump’s National Golf Course in Briarcliff Manor and Seven Springs, a private estate in Bedford.

As you’d imagine, then, things are believed to be pretty highly strung over in Trump’s camp right now. According to NBC, POTUS 45 and his inner circle are growing ever frustrated with the need to pay the legal bail on top of funding his campaign, which is likewise an urgent and pressing matter. A source close to the campaign told NBC that Team Trump is currently scrambling to work out the best way to fight the situation.

“They’re looking to appeal the actual requirements to have to put up this amount of money to appeal and then, obviously, the appeal itself on grounds it’s a violation of the Eighth Amendment,” the source said. “They have to figure all those machinations out.”

On the other hand, Trump advisor and multiple shirt addict Steve Bannon is of the opinion that his assets getting seized would only be a “massive” boost to Trump’s campaign, as it would add credence to what he’s been saying all along. Namely, that the justice system and the Powers That Be are out to get him and he’s the underdog fighting back against, what Trump has called, the “corrupt Communist system.”

Trump’s campaign does seem to be leaning into Trump’s embarrassing financial failure right now, as an “emergency memo” fundraising appeal was sent out on Wednesday. Sporting the heading, “Keep your filthy hands off of Trump Tower,” the note from Trump himself encouraged supporters to lend some pennies to help stop “insane radical Democrat AG Letitia Wright” who “wants to SEIZE my properties in New York. THIS INCLUDES THE ICONIC TRUMP TOWER!”

A desperate attempt at online panhandling from someone who used to boast about his enormous wealth and business acumen or a canny attempt at turning a major loss into a sinister win? As per an insider to the Trump family, Team Trump is still trying to work that one out. “That is part of the calculation — whether this continues to help or if, in some way, it hurts him,” they said. “The one way is if it affects the pocketbook or the case.”

Maybe if we wish really hard Trump could have all his assets and the election yanked out of his tiny-handed grasp. Forget Donnie, the whole country needs a hug and that one-two win would be the biggest and warmest of bear-hugs.