Woman allegedly hit with ‘you don’t look disabled’ by relative. So she leaves them horrified: ‘The transformation on this person’s face was IMMEDIATE’

A Reddit user recently shared how they allegedly shut down a skeptical relative in the most visceral way possible after being told they didn’t look disabled. The user, No-Geologist-5141, took to Reddit’s traumatizeThemBack subreddit to narrate how she provided a literal, 4D demonstration of their condition when words failed to convince the family member.

In their post, the Redditor shared how a big portion of their life has often involved dealing with people who think they know more about the condition than the patient. The user wrote, “I have Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. If you don’t know what that is, the short version is that my connective tissue is basically held together by hopes, dreams, and whatever structural integrity a wet paper straw has left after 20 minutes.”

The user told the community, “I’m also young. At the time of this story I was 18 and I’m currently close to turning 21. These two facts apparently combine to create a fascinating phenomenon where complete strangers become board-certified physicians the second they look at me.” They also lamented the lack of education and exposure regarding invisible disabilities, or any other disability outside being blind, deaf, or paralyzed. It was something she always had to then explain.

Tired of the question

No-Geologist-5141 alleged, “I have given the Ehlers-Danlos TED Talk more times than I can count. But this particular day, I was tired. Someone in my extended family hit me with the ‘you don’t look disabled’ and then basically doubled down when I told them I have a condition that makes my joints unstable. They clearly did not believe me.” 

“And something in my brain just went: You know what? Visual learner,” the user wrote. “Now, I want to make it VERY clear that this was stupid. Please do not intentionally dislocate or sublux your joints. I already know. My doctors would probably reach through the screen and slap me for this.” 

The Redditor admitted, “I was annoyed, and unfortunately in possession of a body capable of producing evidence on demand.” So, they made eye contact and popped one of their points out.  “The transformation on this person’s face was IMMEDIATE as they saw my arm dangling unanchored to my shoulder,” the post continued. 

“They went from skeptical to absolutely f*****g horrified in approximately 0.2 seconds.” When the family member shouted in shock, the user simply replied, “Yeah. It does that.” Of course, this story is completely No-Geologist-5141’s perspective and cannot be verified.

The demonstration successfully ended the interrogation and pointless advice. No-Geologist-5141 reported that there were no more questions about yoga, age, or “curing” the pain. The relative simply watched in silence as the user put the joint back into place. Reflecting on the event, the user wrote, “So, for once, I provided supporting documentation. In 4D.”

According to the Mayo Clinic, Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (hEDS) is one of 13 types of inherited conditions that affect the body’s connective tissues. These tissues are responsible for providing support and flexibility to joints, skin, organs, and blood vessels. For those living with hEDS, the connective tissue is often too loose, which can lead to chronic pain and frequent joint dislocations.

The Mayo Clinic notes that while symptoms can be managed, there is no cure for EDS. Regular monitoring and baseline exams are often recommended to manage the risks associated with the condition.

Reddit was in awe of No-Geologist-5141. One user commented, “Spite is actually an important part of structural integrity, so I’d say you’re doing great!” Another user noted, “Not medically advisable but damn if I haven’t done the same thing. If they need a visual representation of my illness, I’ma show them something they’ll never forget. Good for you OP! EDS gang, outtttt.”

Another commenter shared a similar story regarding a gym teacher who did not believe them. “Then we had this self defense thing where they twisted your arm behind your back until you cried uncle? And I.. didn’t. The arm just kept moving and popped a little and kept on. Teacher panicked, I found a door and popped it back nbd,” the user wrote. 

The Center for Disability Rights notes that people with invisible or hidden disabilities frequently face scrutiny from society because they look able-bodied. This lack of visible indicators, such as a wheelchair or a cane, often results in friends, family, and co-workers questioning the validity of their disability. In one recent case, a woman was denied pre-boarding because she ‘didn’t look disabled enough.’

The Center for Disability Rights emphasizes that this constant need to justify one’s health status can be draining and that the best approach is to believe individuals when they speak about their limitations. They also encouraged people to be patient and respectful, reminding everyone that we cannot always see what someone else is going through.