Woman tells her doctors she can’t urinate after hysterectomy, but is allegedly ignored. Now she is living with a permanent catheter

Jaymee (jaymee.the.genuine.mom) has a crazy life story. She has always been vocal about her experiences with and advocacy for chronic illness, neurodivergency, and women’s health. However, one of her recent posts was an emotional summary of the biggest health problem she ever faced, drawing in over 2.5 million viewers on Instagram. In the video, she details how her concerns following a hysterectomy were allegedly dismissed by her obstetrician.

It eventually led to a diagnosis of a neurogenic bladder and the need for a permanent suprapubic catheter. She set the stage for her followers with a sobering caption: “Did you know that MEDICAL GASLIGHTING tops the list of patient safety risks? Over 94% of patients report their concerns were ignored, and that dismissal leads to worse conditions for 55% of victims. We NEED to talk about it.”

In the video, Jaymee looks resigned as she mouthed the dialogue of her interactions with her doctor to illustrate how her health issue escalated. She recounted a timeline that spanned months of frustration and physical pain. According to her, the initial post-operative period was where the cracks first appeared. When she told her OB, “I woke up from surgery unable to pee,” she was purportedly told, “Your bladder hasn’t woken up yet.”

A horrifying spiral

As weeks turned into months, the situation spiralled. Per her post, Jaymee told her doctor, “It’s been six weeks, I still can’t pee normally… I have no urgency to pee, and when I start a stream it stops.” She claimed that her doctor was dismissive, stating, “You need to retrain your bladder.” 

By the nine-month mark, the pain was debilitating. She told the OB, “It’s been 9 months since the hysterectomy. I can barely get a little pee out. It hurts so much. Nothing is working the way it was before. I’m hurting. I’ve gained so much weight. Can you help me?” Allegedly, the doctor told her, “You just have an oversized bladder. Set timers.”

Even when she pointed out that she didn’t have an oversized bladder before the surgery, her concerns were brushed aside. Then, it seems she had to rush to the hospital with an emergency. She told the resident, “PLEASE help me! I haven’t peed in 24 hours. My abdomen is so swollen, and I’m hurting so much.” The resident gave her some validation, telling her,  “Your bladder is dangerously enlarged.” 

When the original OB finally appeared, they allegedly claimed, “This wasn’t the hysterectomy. I’ve never seen this,” and left the room. It took a new OB and a urologist to  provide clarity and help. The urologist told her, “I’ve reviewed your file, and it’s clear you have an underactive Neurogenic Bladder, which can happen from any abdominal surgery. I am so sorry no one helped you.” Unfortunately, her OB warned, “Your bladder will never recover.”

According to the Cleveland Clinic, medical gaslighting occurs when a healthcare provider’s behavior makes a patient feel unheard, unimportant, and causes them to question if their symptoms are real. It often leads to misdiagnoses and a breakdown of trust. 

Factors like tight schedules, physician burnout, and implicit bias, often against women, can contribute to this phenomenon. The Clinic suggested a second opinion, writing that you are the most important person in the room during any appointment, and your health should never be dismissed.

Neurogenic bladder is a term used by medical professionals to describe bladder dysfunction caused by nerve complications. According to ABC Medical, the bladder requires nerve and muscle coordination to function, and when those nerves are damaged or disrupted, special interventions are often needed. 

Per ABC, some cases can be managed with lifestyle changes or medications. If the nerves are not functional and cannot be repaired, it is permanent. Treatment often involves a catheterization program to allow the bladder to expand and empty at appropriate times to reduce the risk of kidney damage and infections.

Instagram was furious for Jaymee. One user commented, “WHY CAN’T THEY JUST HELP YOU THE FIRST TIME YOU SAY SOMETHING IS WRONG IT’S SO FRUSTRATING I HATE IT.” One TikToker recently shared a story of being ignored when she reached out to her obstetrician for help. 

Another shared a similar story of being dismissed: “I went to ER 6 times over 2 months with [severe] upper back pain. Dismissed as reflux, gas, weight gain… Turns out my gall bladder was a solid mass of stones.” One Instagrammer advised, “Remember to always ask for a written explanation of WHY they’re denying you care. They change their tunes reeeaaal fast.” 

Jaymee now posts about her life with a catheter and a collection bag, emphasizing the importance of living without shame.