Despite the almost complete lack of Bill (Stephen Moyer) and Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) vampire goodness, the finale of True Blood season four was probably one of the series’s best finales, managing to combine mindless action, serious plot development, every major True Blood villain in history, and crazy-naked-vampire-bondage-burnings.
Sookie (Anna Paquin) made a vital decision in the whole “Bill or Eric or Alcide (Joe Manganiello)” department, and more than one major character died. Read on!
The episode opens with Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) and Jesus (Kevin Alejandro), the former being possessed by Marnie (Fiona Shaw), eager to steal Jesus’s magic goat demon powers and use them to kill Bill and Eric, vampires at large. Threatening to knife Lafayette’s incredibly sculpted body, Jesus trades his own, making him the first main character of the episode to be dead as a doornail. He gets stabbed in the stomach.
Meanwhile, Sookie is learning a lesson from Holly (Lauren Bowles) about the truth of Samhain, the witches’ name for Halloween, when the veil between the living and the dead is at its thinnest. This is when Tara (Rutina Wesley) busts onto the scene, letting Sookie know that Jesus is dead and Marnie is back. The ladies dive into the nearest car and realize that Bill and Eric are missing.
In a scene that would typically be epic enough for a season finale, Holly, Tara, and Sookie arrive in a field where Eric and Bill, naked, are silvered to a pole on top of a pile of fire wood. They then use their witch powers to create a barrier around the boys and summon the dead, including Adele Stackhouse (Lois Smith) herself, exorcist extraordinaire. Antonia (Paola Turbay) is able to convince Marnie to go to her grave in peace, and Lafayette lives on.
What? You thought the episode was over? Nope. First, Sookie basically slaps God in the face by rejecting both Bill and Eric for Alcide (presumably), who despite his incredible body, is boring and stupid and ugly. Sookie makes the worst decision possible, as usual, by choosing the werewolf, who has officially left Debbie (Brit Morgan) for good.
Speaking of horrible relationship decisions, Jason (Ryan Kwanten) tells Hoyt (Jim Parrack) that he slept with Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll), crushing any remaining crumbs of a soul Hoyt may have had left, and then he proceeds to have sex with Jessica again, even though she doesn’t want to be in a relationship. I love Jessica and all, but the girl needs to slow down.
Other amazing happenings in this finale include the inclusion of all of the True Blood antagonists, via the magic of Samhain. Rene the serial killer (Michael Raymond-James) tells Arlene (Carrie Preston) that Terry’s (Todd Lowe) past is going to come back to bite him, Reverend Newlin (Michael McMillian) pops up at Jason’s door with a surprise set of fangs, and Alcide is led to the site of Russell Edgington’s (Denis O’Hare) burial, where he has apparently broken out of the concrete. None of these scenes went anywhere, but all of these baddies will clearly be in the next season.
Now for the double ending. Part one: Nan Flanagan (Jessica Tuck) busts into King Bill’s castle, telling them that she has thrown her vampire lobbyist duties out the window, and she wants them to go rogue as well. Too bad she calls them “puppy dogs” salivating over Sookie, causing Eric to promptly behead her backup army and Bill to knife her in the stomach.
Part two: the death that should’ve happened long ago. Sookie and Tara, the most irrelevant and frustrating character in the show’s history, are chilling in the old Stackhouse place, when Debbie, crazy over Alcide’s love for Sookie, shows up with a gun. She shoots at Sookie, Tara dives in the way, taking the bullet to the back of the head to save Sookie, and then Sookie shoots Debbie in the throat.
The resolution of True Blood season four realistically began last episode, when Bill shot Marnie. It was pretty much all wrapped up when Marnie went with all the other dead people, so this finale was truthfully all about doing awesome things for the fans, like bringing back old villains, killing a bunch of people, and having lots of scenes with both Bill and Eric in the same frame.
Whether it be Sookie and Eric shacking up, imaginary threesomes, Tara’s timely death, or the return of beloved baddies, season four of True Blood was nothing short of fan fiction come to life, and I am okay with that.