No one does longevity quite like McDonald’s, and I’m not just talking about their heat lamps. Having been introduced to the world in 1940, the fast food chain has since established itself as the single most prominent enterprise of hamburgers, fries, chicken-like substances, and questionable business ethics in the world, and those golden arches remain as iconic as ever.
But you don’t get longevity without innovation, which is just a romantic way of saying that the most lucrative business are usually those that can take the idea of something and squeeze as many revenue streams out of it as conceivably possible. Soon, that idea will be your grandmother, per The New York Post.
Grandma’s McFlurry, explained
If you stroll into McDonald’s expecting to be handed the McFlurry that your specific grandma last purchased, you will be disappointed (although, if you coordinate with your grandma, there’s nothing stopping you from pulling that off). Inspired by the candies that so many of us associated with our grandmothers when we were young, the limited-edition Grandma McFlurry is a vanilla McFlurry blended with syrup and pieces of crunchy candy. It’s not yet clear what the candy actually is, but the obvious first guess (and the one made by many a Redditor since this announcement) is that it’s butterscotch. After all, where there’s butterscotch candy, there’s probably a grandmother nearby.
But the McDonald’s Grandma campaign isn’t ending there; the company is also rolling out the Grandma’s McFlurry Mobile; a vehicle stylized as an ice cream truck of yore that will be taking a spin around New York City and offering free samples of the new McFlurry prior to its release in restaurants.
Moreover, the company will also be partnering with Remi Wolf and Jay Wheeler to reimagine such oldies as Marvin Gaye’s “How Sweet It Is (To Be Loved by You)” and Los Panchos’ “Piel Canela,” which will be available on all music streaming platforms on the same day of the Grandma McFlurry’s release.
Indeed, it seems that McDonald’s has pulled out nearly all the stops to monetize your grandmother; the only thing they’re really missing is a menu full of items that aren’t processed beyond comprehension like in the good old days. They can keep Speedee, though; the thought of Ronald McDonald’s predecessor returning to the fray feels like more of a threat than anything.
The Grandma McFlurry, and all of the grandma-adjacent products along with it, will release in restaurants and/or their respective markets on May 21.
