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Piers Morgan attends a basketball game between the Los Angeles Lakers and the Golden State Warriors at Crypto.com Arena
Photo by Allen Berezovsky/Getty Images

‘Morganitus’: Piers Morgan can’t stop coughing or gagging and onlookers think they know why

So there IS something that can shut him up.

Piers Morgan has walked right into becoming the butt of countless jokes after sharing a post on social media about his current health condition. 

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The talk show host took to X today to inform followers that he currently has a “vile bug” that is causing him to “cough/gag all day long.” Morgan asked whether anyone else is experiencing the illness, and he said it is “driving me nuts,” which is exactly how I feel whenever I somehow stumble upon a clip from Piers Morgan Uncensored. Beyond the fact that Morgan’s post reads like that of someone who took the “What’s on your mind?!” status prompt a bit too literally (not every thought needs documenting), or the fact that X is not WebMD, the mention of “gag” naturally prompted some hilarious responses.   

Swathes of users flocked to Morgan’s post to suggest what might be behind Morgan’s curious condition, with many suggesting that the gags could’ve been induced by any number of his talk show guests. “Side effect of talking to Taylor Lorenz and Harry Sisson,” one user wrote, in reference to their recent appearance on Uncensored. Another user echoed the sentiment, saying Morgan’s illness “could be [the result of] some of your guests.” If it wasn’t one of his guests that prompted the gags, then some users suggested it could be Morgan himself.   

“Only when I read your posts,” one person wrote, with another suggesting the medical diagnosis for the gagging condition is “called Piers Morgan.” Elaborating on that same punchline, one user joked that the cough “is called Morganitus,” and can be treated by “not listening to Piers Morgan for 48 hours.” In response, Morgan himself delivered quite a self-aware reply while writing “too hard – I love listening to the sound of my own voice.” Elsewhere, users simply replied “No, gross” to Morgan’s question about whether anyone else suffered the sickness, or used the post to invoke the words of Elon Musk

“That’s the woke mind virus,” they wrote, recalling the same quote Musk used when discussing his child earlier this year, “we’ll pray for you.” It’s hardly the first time Morgan has attracted the internet’s attention for his comments, having copped backlash for everything from his takes on Kamala Harris and The View to his discussion of Liam Payne’s death and his opinions on Jay-Z and Beyonce.The latter topic eventually saw Morgan receive a cease and desist letter, but he hasn’t ceased, nor desisted from continuing to discuss his illness.

In a follow-up message, Morgan — seemingly thinking a post about a seemingly benign cough warranted more attention — waxed statistical about the responses he had received on the post. He said that the replies to his post about the cough “are a good snapshot of X” (yeah, real software engineering stuff), before grouping the responses into percentages. Morgan estimated that 50% of  people were “being nice & offering their own experiences/advice,” while 20% of people were “taking the p*ss in a funny way.” 

The remaining 30% were users “taking the p*ss in an unfunny way,” blaming the COVID-19 vaccine, or blaming Donald Trump, according to Morgan. I know he’s not the root cause of all problems, but when I’m gagging uncontrollably anytime the president-elect comes on my TV screen, how could Trump not be the cause? Anyway, I hope the talk show host’s case of Morganitis is on the mend, though I’m disappointed it hasn’t resulted in a brief medical absence.


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Author
Image of Tom Disalvo
Tom Disalvo
Tom Disalvo is an entertainment news and freelance writer from Sydney, Australia. His hobbies include thinking what to answer whenever someone asks what his hobbies are.