State Of The Game – Vol. 1: Prologue

I don’t think I need to explain this section, do I? No? Good.

BioShock Inifinite‘s Box Art Is Disappointing

If you haven’t seen it yet, the final box art of BioShock Infinite has been revealed, and it’s…well…it’s not great. You can see a bit of it right there above, where the protagonist is holding a shotgun over his shoulder while brooding like there’s no tomorrow. Perhaps he’s distraught over the burning flag behind him? Who knows.

The internet has gone up in flame (pun perhaps intended) over how the box art has managed to embrace the very generic feeling of pretty much every other game involving guns. With a bit less color you could almost think this is the latest in the Call of Duty franchise. Perhaps that’s exactly what marketers are going for, but man are the buyers of the game in for a rude awakening expecting a mindless FPS and get deeper into the game to find a rich, deep, unique experience that BioShock has always brought.

What’s perhaps so insulting about the cover is that BioShock may be one of only two games currently active to have an art style that’s just SCREAMING for an old-school box art, Fallout being the other one. There are tons of other fan made box arts floating around on forums and whatnot. I feel especially sorry for all those shelling out a ton of money on one of the special edition sets.

And for those saying this isn’t a big deal, well, maybe it isn’t. It might not be to you, but there’s a large part of the community who loves to hold everything dear to them in video games with the ferocity of a mother bear. The other BioShock box arts are iconic; we’ll likely all remember the menacing image of the Big Daddy on the first game. It was such a different kind of character. It not only entranced people who had no idea what the game was about, but managed to make the excitement for fans grow even more with what they knew they were getting into. Infinite would have been infinitely better (pun completely intended) with the Song Bird on the cover, following the tradition, and keeping that interest.

Nope. 2K couldn’t even do that.

Sony is Making Ridiculous Controllers Again

…Seriously? Okay, Sony. I know you still think it’s cool to try to capture some of Nintendo’s success with the motion control market, but literally no one thought one of the GREAT things about Wiimotes was the hilarious nature of some of the extra controllers.

To be fair, this is only a patent and doesn’t necessarily mean we’ll have weird controllers that snap in half soon. After all, if Sony acted on every patent they put forward, the Vita would be able to somehow fold in half. Remember that? Sony has a patent for some kind of temporarily foldable electronics. It’s weird, but it never happened. Hopefully this won’t either. I’m sure all seven PlayStation Move owners won’t miss it.

Looks Like a Yoshi Game is Heading to Wii U

This is something that’s sort of been developing over the past few weeks. According to a hacked menu on the Wii U, there’s a game called Yoshi’s Land planned for Wii U. Nintendo outright refused the game existed, as they usually do. However, when Best Buy updated their video game listings to feature the game? It’s either one hell of a coincidence, someone who runs Best Buy’s website has an awesome sense of humor or we’re getting a new Yoshi game.

Obviously details are scarce since the game doesn’t technically exist yet, but it just seems odd that of all of Nintendo’s franchises, Yoshi is the one that they’re trying to keep secret. Why couldn’t a new Star Fox game be leaked? Remember Star Fox? It was that game we all played in the mid-90s and kept begging for a proper sequel? Or what about Metroid? We all forgive you, Nintendo, for allowing Other M to come into existence. It’s okay. We don’t hate the franchise, it was just that one game.

You know what’d be great? Playing a Metroid game and having all your tools and weapons and map on the GamePad. Or a Star Fox game in which your GamePad is controlling the Arwing. OR AN F-ZERO GAME WHERE THE GAMEPAD IS YOUR STEERING WHEEL. All of my money, Nintendo. All of it. You better be working on something AWESOME.

I suppose it has been longer since a dedicated Yoshi game was released. Technically. But still, it’s not too far off from Mario, which seems to be the only thing Nintendo is relying on so far for the Wii U. That doesn’t bode well for gamers hungry for their favorite franchises.

Speaking of Nintendo…

Wii Mini is Apparently a Thing

I know we’ve all made jokes at one point or another about how Nintendo doesn’t know how to do online stuff very well since they’re apparently still stuck in 1993, but to remove the capability of having it? And to limit the console’s release to Canada? There’s a “‘Murica EFF YEAH!” joke in there somewhere, but I’m not going to be the one to look like a fool coming up with it.

So Nintendo is releasing a miniature version of the already-pretty-damn-small Wii (not U) in Canada for the not so miniature price of $99. That’s not bad for a video game console, but considering you can nab a Wii classic with full internet capabilities for just a few bucks more seems a lot more appealing.

Am I the only person who wants to see the backside of this thing? those ports must be absolutely crammed in there.

This’ll go on the shelf with other regional consoles, right next to the N64DD. Don’t know what that is? Don’t worry, it’s not that big of a deal. Neither i this. Get it? Big? Wii Mini? I know, you love me.

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