Having used the double whammy of the Rocky and Rambo franchises as a springboard to becoming one of the biggest stars on the planet, Sylvester Stallone wasn’t used to being told no by the mid-1980s. And yet, being constantly turned down is pretty much the entire reason why we were given the gift of preposterous cult favorite action extravaganza Cobra.
Sly was in line to play Axel Foley in Beverly Hills Cop, but he ended up suggesting an extensive rewrite of the script that would have turned the soon-to-be Eddie Murphy vehicle into something unrecognizable from the instant classic it became. As a result, Stallone was dropped from the project, and then turned the majority of his suggested ideas into the basis for Cobra.
Wallowing in excess and creative freedom, the first cut of the film was given a dreaded X-rating by the MPAA, and so much footage ended up being removed that the theatrical release only ran for a rapid-fire 89 minutes. Positively dripping in machismo, drenched in leather, and slathered in cheese, the simplest way to read Cobra is Stallone seriously overcompensating for missing out on Beverly Hills Cop.
Six Razzie nominations and a critical pounding were the end result, even if the unhinged revenge story netted $160 million at the box office. It holds up today as a snapshot of a very specific time in the history of the action genre, but modern viewers and even Redditors are still struggling to comprehend the fact that Cobra isn’t intended to be a parody.
If you’re in the right frame of mind and you don’t treat it anywhere near as seriously as Stallone did, then Cobra is a dementedly enjoyable romp, even if it’s nowhere near being one of the decade’s – or the star’s – best.
