Why Deadpool Is THE GREATEST MOVIE EVER!!!! Definitely Not Written By Deadpool.

5) Marvel Has A Sense Of Humor???

Props Marvel – you took a lashing from “The Mouth” himself, and lived to see another day ($150 million dollars richer, just in one weekend). Sorry for all the digs at your stupid post-credits mindgames, multiple reboots, and really, really, REALLY BAD past decisions. But I gave DC a taste of DP too! Hehe. Green Lantern didn’t escape! It probably wasn’t easy to man up and take a few punches to the gut, but hopefully those actual punches to the gut during our “discussions” weakened the emotional blow. It’s nothing personal!

Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick shared my take on today’s tight-fitting movie culture, and we went no-holds barred. Gloves came off. Being nice is soOoOoOoOo boring. All the world’s funniest people are assholes! Denis Leary wrote a song about it! But, to OK a movie that teabags your entire cinematic universe? That takes some steel, Colossus-sized huevos even Deadpool can appreciate! And yes, I’m using third person sometimes! Because I’m not a writer and I don’t give a shit!

So, Marvel, let me embrace a rare moment of humility and say thank you for being such a good sport! Then let me come out of that humble notion by then saying SERIOUSLY, STILL FUCK YOU FOR X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE. [SUPER SAD CRYING FACE]