‘I just want a good night’s sleep’: Man asks Reddit if he was wrong to ask grieving wife to sleep on the couch because of her nightmares

People deal with grief in a myriad of ways. One man learned just how tough the process can be after his wife’s behavior began affecting his sleep. The man took to Reddit seeking the opinion of others as he claimed he had asked his wife to sleep on the couch due to her grief-induced nightmares stopping him from catching some much-needed shut-eye.

The anonymous man turned to a popular subreddit to ask whether he was in the wrong for asking his wife to sleep on the couch. In his post, he claimed that his wife and her sister had been in a car crash a few months ago and that the sister had passed away, which he said “has been devastating for my wife.”

Since the accident, the wife had been experiencing nightmares, which the OP claimed would wake him up in the middle of the night. To help deal with the problem, the man said he suggested his wife sleep on the couch “once or twice a week.” However, his suggestion allegedly resulted in an argument between the couple, and so he sought answers from the Reddit community.

Financial struggles made the situation harder

The OP claimed that he needed a good night’s sleep as he was working 10-12 hour shifts, and his income was the only money they had coming in due to his wife allegedly losing her job due to depression. The man also said that they could not afford therapy, claiming that all he could do was keep working, despite not getting adequate sleep each night.

He also said that the couch was not comfortable enough for him to get a good night’s sleep, which was why he had asked his wife to take the couch. “I just want a good nights sleep and I can’t sleep on the couch or I will be in pain the next morning,” he said.

Commenters sympathized with the man and his wife, offering suggestions that might work as an alternative to sleeping on the couch. One commenter suggested getting a separate, smaller bed or futon that they could put in another room in their home, such as the living room; they also suggested earplugs. Another asked whether the wife “should qualify for unemployment” and suggested applying for that.

A third suggested asking the wife’s parents to help with paying for therapy, but according to the OP, “Her family don’t believe in therapy.” The OP’s wife may be able to apply for unemployment and, according to Kantorlaw.net, could also be eligible for mental health disability benefits.