‘Illegitimate’: Redditor says their wife kept pushing their sister to marry her son’s father, until the sister snapped back about her weight

A single mother’s choice not to marry her son’s father has reportedly bothered her sibling’s wife for years. That tension allegedly boiled over during a recent visit, when the sister fired back with a cutting comment about her sister-in-law’s weight, according to a Reddit post by u/Antique_Pianist_7765 in r/AmItheAsshole. The exchange reportedly lasted about two minutes and left the wife sobbing.

The poster’s 27-year-old sister has a five-year-old son with her former boyfriend. She reportedly chose not to marry him when she found out she was pregnant, saying they just were not compatible for the long haul. The former couple apparently maintain a healthy co-parenting relationship with 50-50 custody, and both hold stable, well-paying jobs while living nearby.

The poster’s wife allegedly has a major issue with this arrangement. She thinks the sister should have married the father, and she apparently hates that her sister-in-law calls him her baby daddy. She reportedly brings it up every time they see each other, and the sister has privately said she is fed up with the comments.

The marriage lectures had apparently been going on for years

The wife allegedly pushes her sister-in-law to try to get him back, ask for a proposal, or explain why she remains single after five years. The poster says they have spoken to the wife about it, but the behavior never stopped. Not everyone sees single life as something to fix, with one woman saying her favorite part of dating is the day the other person suddenly turns cold.

The situation exploded during a visit to the couple’s home. The group was reportedly having a normal conversation about the nephew starting kindergarten when the wife suddenly shifted the tone. She allegedly told her sister-in-law to head to the courthouse to marry her ex-boyfriend.

The wife reportedly claimed that other parents would see the sister as immature and would view her child as “illegitimate” if she did not get married. The poster never got a chance to step in. The sister allegedly snapped and told her sister-in-law to “worry about her fat self and losing 100 pounds” before worrying about her child.

She also reportedly added that “a ring can’t hide her triple chin and to worry less about her going to the courthouse and more about the gym.” The poster says the wife has always been on the bigger side and that this is her biggest insecurity. She started sobbing immediately, and the sister grabbed her things and left.

The poster says they froze because they didn’t know what to do. After the sister left, the wife asked why the poster did not defend her. The poster told her she was wrong to call the sister immature and her child illegitimate, while acknowledging that the sister’s comments were harsh but not completely unprovoked. The wife is reportedly giving the poster the silent treatment, apparently because they refused to take her side.

Unmarried parenthood is common in the U.S. In 2023, births to unmarried women made up 40% of all births in the country, according to the CDC. Family tension over relationships and parenthood can run deep in other ways too, as one woman born from an affair learned when her husband allegedly repeated her family’s secret with a married coworker.

Commenters on the post appear divided. Some say, “Your wife sounds awful. YTA for letting her keep disrespecting your sister and her son for so long,” while others feel everyone involved is to blame. A few suggested the wife messed around for five years “and finally found out.”

The account comes solely from the poster, and neither the wife’s nor the sister’s side of the story could be verified.