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Marjorie Taylor Greene
Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images

‘Did I fall into an alternate universe?’: Marjorie Taylor Greene just threatened every Republican and honestly, we’re on board

Nut up or shut up, Marge.

I never thought I’d see the day when I agree with Marjorie Taylor Greene, but it seems hell has finally frozen over.

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The 50-year-old typically offers up as much reason as a sea monkey, but for once she’s actually speaking sense. We must have passed into an alternate universe at some point — one in which Robert F. Kennedy Jr. actually speaks the truth for a moment and Greene calls out her Republican colleagues over something that’s been broadly ignored for decades, at least.

This strange new alternate reality saw Greene take to Twitter for a typical rage sesh, but in the process, she called for something I couldn’t support more. In a petulant attempt to frighten her fellow fraudsters and felons into backing off of Matt Gaetz, Greene actually called for accountability in Congress. A wild demand from someone like Greene, to be sure, but one that is actually years overdue.

Gaetz recently joined the first wave of Donald Trump’s cabinet appointees, with the president-elect tapping him for attorney general. It is a truly insane decision, what with Gaetz’s sordid history, and it quickly received broad pushback from both the public and Congress. A number of congressional leaders are now calling for previous investigations into Gaetz — of which there were several — to be made public, and Marge is trying to back them into a corner.

Greene and Gaetz are bootlicking butt buddies these days, which means the brusque, braying blonde is working overtime to cheerlead for her new ally. She doesn’t want Gaetz’s records revealed to the public, and so she’s leaning on the rampant cover-ups and unethical behavior displayed by the vast majority of her Republican peers as a deterrent.

Addressing the tweet to her “Republican colleagues in the House and Senate,” Greene declared, “If we are going to release ethics reports and rip apart our own that Trump has appointed, then put it ALL out there for the American people to see.”

Greene wants everyone in Congress, but her Republican peers in particular, to release “all the ethics reports and claims,” including, “sexual harassment and assault claims that were secretly settled paying off victims with taxpayer money” to the public. She added, “the entire Jeffrey Epstein files, tapes, recordings, witness interviews” to the list of documents that should be released, and added, “If we’re going to dance, let’s all dance in the sunlight. I’ll make sure we do.”

I’m not sure if Marge realizes what she’s doing here, but what she’s calling for is actually a hugely necessary act that we should all support. If she were successful, it might even set a precedent for politicians to be held accountable for their actions. Shocking, I know — but possible.

Of course, that would mean Marge herself — along with Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, Mitch McConnell, and all the other soulless snakes in the Senate and House — might likewise be held accountable for their actions. It would also mean any of the morally bankrupt politicians on the left side of the aisle — of which there are certainly several — would likewise be exposed, which just might pave the way for that draining of the swamp Trump and his ilk are always crooning about.

The issue is, Marge is a deep-set swamp monster. So is pretty much everyone in Congress, and an examination of everything they’ve gotten away with would expose that in no time. If we were to actually take Greene’s advice, we’d have four members left in Congress by the end of the year, and a whole lot more faith in the process as a whole.

So I say: Go for it, Marge. Drain the damn swamp. Pull up those records and destroy the reputations of all the amoral men and women polluting our government. By the time you’re finished, we’ll have a second chance at electing people with actual morals into office, and Greene will be a distant memory — but one that actually did something right by the end.


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Author
Image of Nahila Bonfiglio
Nahila Bonfiglio
Nahila carefully obsesses over all things geekdom and gaming, bringing her embarrassingly expansive expertise to the team at We Got This Covered. She is a Staff Writer and occasional Editor with a focus on comics, video games, and most importantly 'Lord of the Rings,' putting her Bachelors from the University of Texas at Austin to good use. Her work has been featured alongside the greats at NPR, the Daily Dot, and Nautilus Magazine.