‘The real bigfoot watching them’: Oklahoma man who faked Bigfoot sighting comes clean in the most hilarious way possible

Is there any saga more gleefully timeless than that of Bigfoot? Think about it — a cross-cultural, cross-generational story about a tall, hairy hominid lurking in the wild, far away from whatever counted as civilization at the time, whose mythology continues to expand even in this post-capitalist meme hell where the currency is engagement. It’s genuinely remarkable.

We have, of course, reached a point where most every claim of a Bigfoot sighting is going to be written off (presumably, up to and including the scenario in which we discover Bigfoot for real). TikTok‘s @e_man580 knows this, and has subsequently gone all-in on what we’re now dubbing the 21st Century Bigfoot Sighting, where the goal is to go viral with Bigfoot-coded meme nonsense.

First, some background. Per the New York Post, our friend E-Man posted a since-deleted TikTok not too long ago (a shorter version of the one above), wherein he tried — with questionable tenacity — to pass off this Sasquatch encounter as the real deal. As you can imagine, every single commenter figured out that this was staged; if not for the obvious rubbery flap of the costume, then the fact that the video turned out to be an advertisement for the Bigfoot Head Shop in Lawton, Oklahoma.

So, per the request of the people, E-Man posted the full video of his Sasquatch sighting for all to see, and for a beast that has always been defined by its boreal solitude, it sure has an instinctual grasp on how to respond in the face of DJ Snake’s and Lil Jon’s “Turn Down for What”; look at those moves!

Evidently, this Sasquatch is one of a kind. One commenter inquired “How did you get him to dance? The one living behind my house has no apparent interest in grooving. He just growls at me and takes my goats.” E-Man revealed in a reply that the key to the Sasquatch’s groove-happy heart is a nice, hearty dose of marijuana, after which the creatures presumably trade in the goats for a family-sized bag of Doritos.

Moreover, this revolutionary Bigfoot footage implies a more universal affinity for popular music. Does Bigfoot begin crying when it hears Taylor Swift? Does it sashay immaculately upon getting an earful of Chappell Roan? Does it transform into Giga Bigfoot when presented with Slipknot? We need more answers, E-Man!

Now, I could sit here and go through the hard science about how Bigfoot is almost universally believed by experts to be fake, but that won’t bestow you with any more information or lore than you already had going into this. Instead, why not take a glimpse at the undeniably fun mythology surrounding the creature? According to Tsem Rinpoche, some little-known Bigfoot tidbits include its ability to read minds and psychically shock anyone who witnesses it, its team-ups with fellow cryptid Chupacabra, its preferred communication method of tree knocking, and its love of apples.

All this, and now, thanks to E-Man, we know that they can have a hell of a time at the club. Where will the Bigfoot story go next?