The results of the 2024 elections are here, and God has a few words to say to America

The same day the 2024 presidential race was decided, God packed his bags and broke up with the U.S. Now, evidence suggests He may not come back for at least the next four years.

“Make America Pray Again,” Donald Trump said months ago, making his manipulative sales pitch as he held a $60 Bible containing not only God’s word but also the nation’s founding documents – the same documents that have something to say about the separation of church and state – plus the “God Bless the USA” chorus handwritten by Lee Greenwood, because why not.

When he made the proclamation, Trump likely did not have in mind the millions of American residents – not to mention citizens of other nations – who would be praying not to have a repeat of 2016 and the four years that followed – only exponentially worse this time around.

Taking into consideration how fearful and anxious people were about the result of this particular election, it is unsurprising to learn that God was awfully busy with all the prayers coming in on Nov. 5.

Christian pro-Trump supporters believe that the billionaire felon will “unite the nation under God,” even though, especially this election cycle, he and his underlings have employed a kind of rhetoric that may inspire anything but unity and harmony. Unbeknownst to them, these individuals fell for what was little more than a persistent marketing strategy that sought to exploit and weaponize their religious beliefs and secure their votes without genuinely sharing their faith.

Sufficient citizens of this nation have made their misguided dreams come true, while everyone else is now entering a nightmare that feels straight out of 1984.

Even God and Satan have to agree on this

In the aftermath of this race to the White House, God has apparently had enough and decided to cut ties with America. Trump supporters in the comments were not pleased with this decision. So, true to the MAGA spirit, they decided to come for God, in a way that only reasonable, God-loving, virtuous people could:

Well, one has come to expect this kind of crude, hateful rhetoric from X users, a social media site that, with Elon Musk at the helm, has notoriously become a breeding ground for disinformation and vitriol. In a recent article published in The Atlantic, staff writer Charlie Warzel stated unequivocally: “X is no longer a social-media site with a white-supremacy problem, but a white-supremacist site with a social-media problem.”

While they are known to be as unalike as fire and ice, even Satan seemed to align with God on the issue of the 2024 election results, if one is to interpret this post as expressing the disbelieving outrage that it seems to denote:

As much as we may joke to cope, God does not have an X in actuality, but if He had, I’d reckon he would tweet something along these lines. There is no “love thy neighbor” in Trump’s mentality and proposed policies, only if the definition of “neighbor” were restricted to those directly on his side – which, news flash, is not the Bible’s intended reading. One’s “neighbor” is not someone who lives in the house next to mine and shares all my beliefs, but anyone we encounter in our paths.

America will not be more united under someone who ran a campaign fueled on fear, hate, and lies, nor will it be any more productively connected with the rest of the world it is a part of. All we can do now is pray for the best and hope there is still someone who’ll listen.