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Donald Trump looking orange and mad as hell
Photo by Spencer Platt/Getty Images

Donald Trump rocked saggy elephant crotch in public and a fashion expert was like ‘sweetie, no’

This one's definitely giving pachyderm.

No one is accusing former President Donald Trump of being a high-fashion icon, but sometimes the man likes to wear a suit with pants that are noticeably, let’s say, “wrinkly.” This has happened often enough that it’s left a lot of us scratching our heads and wondering what’s going on. Fortunately, a fashion expert is here to clear up the confusion.

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Over on the happiest place on the Internet ⏤ X (formerly Twitter) ⏤ someone shared a post of Trump standing next to the flag with his pants wrinkled more than a centenarian’s face. It’s a look that Trump likes to rock from time to time, and if we had to bet, we’d say it’s probably not intentional. In a tweet that has over 32 million views, X user named @danifurmenek shared a photo of the president and asked an expert to explain “what’s going on with his pants?” That expert, by the way, is none other than menswear writer and expert Derek Guy, who runs the popular menswear blog Die, Workwear!

Guy responded to the query about Trump’s saggy elephant crotch with a confident Obama-like aside ⏤ “Yes, I can” ⏤ before commencing to write a college-level thesis in thread form. Before we get into that, let’s take a look at the pants in question.

Photo via X

Yikes, look at that wrinkled tundra. It’s definitely giving pachyderm. So what’s going on here? Per Guy, fabric comes in different weights in the menswear industry. Anything that’s between 12-14 ounces is considered mid-weight, while 12 ounces and below is lightweight and 14 ounces and up is considered heavy ⏤ you know, like a McDonald’s cheeseburger after it lands in the gut. In hotter climates, Guy said, some men prefer to wear lighter fabrics, as they are cooler. Here’s an example of a suit with a fabric of 8 ounces.

Photo via X

Fabric hangs differently based on a number of factors, including weave, finish, and composition, but perhaps the most important variable is the fabric’s weight. Here are two examples provided by Guy: on the left is pure linen at 11 ounces and on the right is 17 ounces. “Look at the difference in the wrinkles around the lap,” he noted.

Photo via X

Lightweight fabrics came into vogue along with central heating, as men didn’t need to wear such heavy fabrics to keep them warm in the winter. Lighter fabrics are also marketed as more luxurious, according to Guy. This being said, there are some inherent problems when a man wears lighter fabrics. If there’s any sort of mismatching between the body and the tailoring, you’re going to get “ugly wrinkles and creases.” Like a cool friend you want to spend time with, a heavier fabric is just a better hang.

Trump, for his part, buys many of his suits from luxury brand Brioni, which markets its suits as “luxurious.” Guy had this to say on such a decision: “As a general rule of thumb, you should try to wear the heaviest fabrics you can bear. Trump favors lightweight, luxurious wools almost year round, and that’s why his pants often look wrinkly.” He then shared more offending examples from the former president.

Photo via X

To sum it up, Trump buys fancy, lightweight suits that tend to leave his legs looking like elephant flesh. It’s a clear example of how not to dress, and honestly, it’s disrespectful to the elephants. If you’re wondering whether or not Trump will change his ways after decades of dressing this way, the guy just admitted that he “has no cognitive,” so I’m gonna go ahead and assume this is a no-way-José situation. Then again, he’s already got genitals on the brain, so you just never know.


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Author
Image of Jon Silman
Jon Silman
Jon Silman is a stand-up comic and hard-nosed newspaper reporter (wait, that was the old me). Now he mostly writes about Brie Larson and how the MCU is nose diving faster than that 'Black Adam' movie did. He has a Zelda tattoo (well, Link) and an insatiable love of the show 'Below Deck.'