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Stephen King reads from his new fiction novel "11/22/63: A Novel" during the "Kennedy Library Forum Series" at The John F. Kennedy Presidential Library and Museum
Photo by Marc Andrew Deley/Getty Images

‘Roseanne Barr for Secretary of Education’: Stephen King confirms that if these 3 people reach high office, the U.S. is BIG screwed

It would be the most ridiculous cabinet of all time.

In 1942, a Black civil rights leader named Bayard Rustin coined the phrase “speak truth to power.” All these years later, horror author Stephen King takes that phrase and personifies it. Even better, he speaks truth to future power. In this case, that’s a potential rogues’ gallery of right-wing celebrities who could terrifyingly hold cabinet positions in a second Donald Trump administration.

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In a post on X with over 1 million views as of this writing, the horror master lays out a nightmare scenario of a cabinet that includes Elon Musk and Kid Rock, along with the aforementioned Trump as president. If this happens, he opines, well, “We’re all f**ked.”

Someone took his tweet even further with a response that added right-wing blowhard and conspiracy lover Roseanne Barr.

On the surface, this all seems innocuous and far-fetched. However, with Trump, one unfortunately can’t take that luxurious level of thinking. During his first term, Trump was notorious for appointing political allies and personal friends to government positions.

In 2017, Rudy Giuliani was put in charge of the administration’s cybersecurity division. His real estate buds Steven Roth and Richard LeFrak were appointed special advisers to an infrastructure plan worth $1 trillion. His fellow billionaire buddy Carl Icahn was given a position in the government cutting regulations.

This is all to say it’s by no means out of the realm of possibility that Trump would appoint any of these people to positions of power. Trump demands, and rewards, loyalty from his subordinates.

Such loyalty is admittedly a double-edged sword because many of these bootlickers have gone to jail for him, including former fixer Michael Cohen and political ally and strategist Steve Bannon. Cohen was charged with numerous counts of tax evasion and other crimes related to a hush money payment he made for Trump to hide the former president’s affair with a porn actress, and Bannon is serving four months for contempt of Congress after refusing to comply with a congressional subpoena.

Now that we’ve sussed out how these political prospects are actually possible, let’s look at these potential celebrity appointments a little closer.

When it comes to Musk, we all know how much he loves Trump. A recent picture of Musk at a Trump rally, jumping in the air and looking like someone who doesn’t know how to jump, was widely ridiculed but underscored the Tesla billionaire’s relationship with the former president nonetheless.

Musk has shown not only his preponderance for conspiracy theories but also an open antagonism against “woke culture,” an inchoate Republican talking point that can pretty much mean anything. Also, he lost billions of dollars on his ego-driven purchase of Twitter (now X), but Trump doesn’t care about that since he’s already offered Musk a “government efficiency commission” position should he get elected.

Kid Rock? Do we need to analyze why Kid Rock would be a bad choice for leading anything? His most famous right-wing moment came during the Bud Light controversy debacle when he fired an automatic weapon at some cans. Sparkling political discourse, that.

This leaves us with Roseanne “Democrats eat babies” Barr, who proudly displayed her mad ignorance and red-pilled persona to a mostly empty auditorium during an appearance on Tucker Carlson’s recent tour. Horror indeed.

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Image of Jon Silman
Jon Silman
Jon Silman is a stand-up comic and hard-nosed newspaper reporter (wait, that was the old me). Now he mostly writes about Brie Larson and how the MCU is nose diving faster than that 'Black Adam' movie did. He has a Zelda tattoo (well, Link) and an insatiable love of the show 'Below Deck.'