Woman throws lavish wedding with 70 guests to ‘marry herself’. Here’s why she did it

An Italian fitness trainer has joined a growing global trend by marrying herself in a ceremony complete with a white wedding dress, a three-layer cake, bridesmaids, and 70 guests. Laura Mesi, 40, celebrated her solo wedding after a 12-year relationship ended, making a promise to love herself in front of friends and family.

The ceremony carries no legal weight. It took place after Mesi made a promise to herself two years earlier. She told friends and family that if she had not found her soulmate by her 40th birthday, she would marry herself. The event was a full celebration, looking like traditional weddings in almost every way except for one thing – there was no groom.

“I firmly believe that each of us must first of all love ourselves,” Mesi said, according to BBC. “You can have a fairytale even without the prince.” She added that while she would be happy to find a partner in the future, her happiness does not depend on finding one. Mesi is reportedly the first Italian woman to hold such a ceremony, though a man named Nello Ruggiero married himself in Naples in May of the same year.

Understanding the sologamy movement

The practice of marrying oneself is known as sologamy or autogamy. It has been around since at least 1993 when American woman Linda Baker married herself in a ceremony with seven bridesmaids and 75 guests. The trend has since spread to countries including the United States, Japan, India, and across Europe. These ceremonies are purely symbolic and have no legal meaning in any country.

Supporters say sologamy is about self-love and self-acceptance. They also say it is about claiming the social recognition that is usually reserved for traditional couples. In Japan, a travel agency began offering bridal ceremonies for single women in 2014. Meanwhile, an American website called I Married Me sells self-wedding kits complete with rings, vows, and affirmation cards. In 2022, Kshama Bindu became the first person in India to marry herself, following all traditional Hindu wedding rituals.

However, the practice has faced a lot of criticism. Some call it narcissistic and self-centered, while others view it as pointless. Comments on Mesi’s wedding photos ranged from congratulatory messages to harsh criticism. Some called her decision sad or even suggested she had mental health issues. British woman Sophie Tanner, who married herself in 2015, told BBC Three that some people called her a sad feminist. While some celebrity couples continue to prove love is still alive, sologamy represents a different way of thinking about commitment.

Despite the backlash, Mesi has brushed off negative comments. She says nothing can turn off her smile. She admits that solo weddings are not for everyone. They require money, support from loved ones, and above all, a pinch of madness, she notes. Therapists have offered mixed views on the trend. Some say self-marriage can help with self-esteem but warn that it should not replace real human connection. Unlike Nicolas Cage’s four-day marriage to Erika Koike, sologamy ceremonies are meant to last as long as the person chooses to honor their promise to themselves.